Date:Friday February 8 2013
*We join the lads gearing up for their crunch tie against West Ham. Lambert enters to find the players eying the new signings speculatively.*
Clark: Um….. Boss…. How much do you know about these new players?
Lambert: Know about them? How`d you mean?
Gabby: Like this guy…
Lambert: Yes, Yacouba Sylla….
Clark: Is he Yacouba Sylla though? I mean he looks an awful lot like a guy wearing a cardboard cut-out mask of Demba Ba.
Sylla: What!? Zis is 'ow you say? Ridiculous!
Clark: Well your hands are white for a start….You`re not Barton are you!?
*The lads all gasp, Gabby leaps forward, tearing the mask from "Sylla`s" face*
All the lads: Paul Faulkner!?
Faulkner: What I am not zis Faulkner you speak of, I am Yacouba Sylla, ze footballing man.
Weimann: He`s not Sylla he looks nothing like the picture on Wikipedia.
Faulkner: Wikipedia!? Everyone is knowing 'alf of ze things on zat are made up.
Gabby: He does have a point….
Clark: Gabby it`s Faulkner. Give it up Paul!
Faulkner: Oh alright. I would have gotten away with too if it wasn`t for you meddling kids….. And your stupid dog!
*The lads look around their feet confused.*
Faulkner: Perhaps if you were as perceptive during corners I wouldn`t have to pretend to be a bloody signing!
*Faulkner storms out*
Lambert: Well, that was unexpected. At least we still have Simon Dawkins, who I expect to make a decent impact.
Dawkins: Why thank you there sir. I certainly will try my gosh darnest.
Delph: Boss…. Isn`t that just Randy Lerner in really offensive blackface make up?
Lambert: What? Fabian don`t be so silly I think I would recognise my 50 year old white boss masquerading as a 25 year old black athlete?......Jesus….. It`s you, isn`t it Mr.Lerner?
Dawkins: Yes sir.
*"Dawkins" bows his head and shuffles out of the room.*
Gabby: Oh well boss no worries eh? You said before we signed anybody we were good enough to stay up so….
*Lambert glares at Gabby*
Date:Friday February 8 2013
Lambert On Cole Omission, & Zoggy Praise (Thursday July 24 2014)
Lambert - We Were Excellent (Thursday July 24 2014)
FC Dallas 0-2 Aston Villa (Thursday July 24 2014)
I Delphinetly Want A New Deal But Luna's Off (Wednesday July 23 2014)
Gardner To Make 2014-15 His Year (Wednesday July 23 2014)
Roncrete's Sett(led) At Villa (Wednesday July 23 2014)
Vlaar Bar (Wednesday July 23 2014)
Lambert Pleased With Workout So Far (Tuesday July 22 2014)
Taxi for Tonev (Tuesday July 22 2014)
Full Squad For Texan Tour (Monday July 21 2014)
|3.||Pride of Lions||427|
|10.||Villan Of The North||161|
|2. Aston Villa||0||0||0||0||+0||0|
|5. Crystal Palace||0||0||0||0||+0||0|
|7. Hull City||0||0||0||0||+0||0|
|United Have a Rival for Vermaelen`s Signature!
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