Date:Friday February 8 2013
*We join the lads gearing up for their crunch tie against West Ham. Lambert enters to find the players eying the new signings speculatively.*
Clark: Um….. Boss…. How much do you know about these new players?
Lambert: Know about them? How`d you mean?
Gabby: Like this guy…
Lambert: Yes, Yacouba Sylla….
Clark: Is he Yacouba Sylla though? I mean he looks an awful lot like a guy wearing a cardboard cut-out mask of Demba Ba.
Sylla: What!? Zis is 'ow you say? Ridiculous!
Clark: Well your hands are white for a start….You`re not Barton are you!?
*The lads all gasp, Gabby leaps forward, tearing the mask from "Sylla`s" face*
All the lads: Paul Faulkner!?
Faulkner: What I am not zis Faulkner you speak of, I am Yacouba Sylla, ze footballing man.
Weimann: He`s not Sylla he looks nothing like the picture on Wikipedia.
Faulkner: Wikipedia!? Everyone is knowing 'alf of ze things on zat are made up.
Gabby: He does have a point….
Clark: Gabby it`s Faulkner. Give it up Paul!
Faulkner: Oh alright. I would have gotten away with too if it wasn`t for you meddling kids….. And your stupid dog!
*The lads look around their feet confused.*
Faulkner: Perhaps if you were as perceptive during corners I wouldn`t have to pretend to be a bloody signing!
*Faulkner storms out*
Lambert: Well, that was unexpected. At least we still have Simon Dawkins, who I expect to make a decent impact.
Dawkins: Why thank you there sir. I certainly will try my gosh darnest.
Delph: Boss…. Isn`t that just Randy Lerner in really offensive blackface make up?
Lambert: What? Fabian don`t be so silly I think I would recognise my 50 year old white boss masquerading as a 25 year old black athlete?......Jesus….. It`s you, isn`t it Mr.Lerner?
Dawkins: Yes sir.
*"Dawkins" bows his head and shuffles out of the room.*
Gabby: Oh well boss no worries eh? You said before we signed anybody we were good enough to stay up so….
*Lambert glares at Gabby*
Date:Friday February 8 2013
The Villa Times - 21/08/2014 (Thursday August 21 2014)
Villa Have A Fox In The (Directors) Box (Thursday August 21 2014)
Bennett Makes Loan Move (Wednesday August 20 2014)
The Vital Villa Man Of The Match v Stoke (away) (Wednesday August 20 2014)
Former Villa CEO Linked To Forest (Wednesday August 20 2014)
Arsenal Man Linked As Villa's New CEO (Wednesday August 20 2014)
17th Minute Applause For Two Toon Fans (Wednesday August 20 2014)
U21s - Villa 1 1 Stoke (Tuesday August 19 2014)
Ins and Outs Still For Villa? (Tuesday August 19 2014)
Vlaar In BBC Team Of The Week (Tuesday August 19 2014)
|2.||Pride of Lions||527|
|4.||Villan Of The North||304|
|6. Aston Villa||1||1||0||0||1||3|
|7. Hull City||1||1||0||0||1||3|
» Hull City : 21/08/2014 21:53:00
|Hammers seek Belgian Defender
» West Ham : 21/08/2014 18:40:00
|What if we bought Pogba?
» Chelsea : 21/08/2014 18:30:00
|Metz in for Maiga?
» West Ham : 21/08/2014 18:05:00
|Feruz Russia Bound
» Chelsea : 21/08/2014 17:46:00