Vital Football

Latest Aston Villa News

@VillasHerc in the dressing before Fulham

@VillasHerc in the dressing before Fulham

*We join the Lambert approaching the dressing room before the match against Fulham*

Lambert: What in the world is that noise?!

*Lambert opens the door to a high, continuous tone. The players are writhing on the ground holding their ears, Lambert covers his eardrums as he scans the room for the source*

Lambert: Brett!? BREEEEETT?!

*Holman the only man still on his feet stops running from wall to wall*

Holman (guiltily): .....YES BOSS!?...

Lambert: WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT TAKING THE BLEEP TEST PAST LEVEL 500!?

*Holman stops the stereo playing the bleep test and the lads all breath a sigh of relief*

Holman (hopefully): Um... That it'd be bonza if I could do it?

*Lambert raises an eyebrow, Holman drops his head*

Holman: That if I do 'that bleeping thing with the bleeping bleep test again you'll bleep me up good and bleeping proper'

Lambert: Aye. Quit it!

Holman: Sorry boss.

Lambert: Right lads first things first, why did the chicken cross the road?

*the lads look at each other with no answer*

Lambert: I don't know, but it most likely had nothing to do with Darren, who will be on the bench.

Bent: What!?

*The dressing room erupts with laughter*

Lambert: Ah. I do love that we can laugh and joke before matches Darren.

Bent: Wait.. So I am starting?

Lambert: No.

*The dressing room erupts with laughter again*

Lambert: Oh we have such a laugh

Bent (arms folded and sulking): I'm not laughing.

Lambert: Oh sure you are.



Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

Writer:Hercs
Date:Saturday October 20 2012
Time: 10:43AM

Comments

0
:o) Quality!
The Fear
20/10/2012 11:09:00
0
That bit about the chicken having nothing to do with Darren is quality. Is it sponsored by V444.
koolbill
20/10/2012 12:31:00
0
bleeping good Hercs......
Pride of Lions
20/10/2012 13:16:00
0
Bent is changing his surname to Bench bill!! A chicken isn't as useless at so many things as our Darren also.
Villan444
20/10/2012 13:22:00
Page 1/1
  1. 1

Login to post a comment

Recent Aston Villa Articles

The Decline Of Aston Villa...

A decent two page spread in The Sun today with a few quotes from me. Here was my full answer to their question...

Match Day Officials v Liverpool

The Premier League have now announced the Match Day officials that will take charge of the game against Liverpool this weekend.

The Aston Villa Walking Wounded - Injury Table

Our weekly update looking at the injury table for Aston Villa and also comparing with all our competitors in the Premier League.

Bunn - The Fans Spurred Us On

Goalkeeper and now No 1 Mark Bunn has said he feels the turning point in Villa's season was seeing the fans frustration up front and close in the FA Cup game against...

Archived Vital Villa Articles

Vital Villa articles from

Site Journalists

J P Fear
Profile
Mike Field
Profile
Steve Wade
Profile
Villa_Grizzly
Profile
Turkish Penguin
Profile
Glensider
Profile
Chris Heath
Profile
M Calucar
Profile
JuanPablo Angel
Profile

Current Poll (see more polls)

Norwich MotM
Suggested By: Site Staff
Bunn5%
Richards1%
Okore10%
Lescott8%
Cissokho0%
Bacuna0%
Gana31%
Westwood1%
Gil7%
Agbonlahor29%
Veretout7%
Sub - Clark1%
ScoopDragon Premier League Network Sites

League Table

# Team P W D L Pts. GD
1 Leicester City 25 15 8 2 53 20
2 Spurs 25 13 9 3 48 26
3 Arsenal 25 14 6 5 48 17
4 Man City 25 14 5 6 47 21
5 Man Utd 25 11 8 6 41 10
6 West Ham 25 10 9 6 39 9
7 Southampton 25 10 7 8 37 9
8 Everton 25 8 11 6 35 12
9 Liverpool 25 9 8 8 35 -4
10 Watford 25 9 6 10 33 0
11 Stoke 25 9 6 10 33 -7
12 Crystal Palace 25 9 5 11 32 -4
13 Chelsea 25 7 9 9 30 -2
14 WBA 25 7 8 10 29 -9
15 AFC Bournemouth 25 7 7 11 28 -12
16 Swansea 25 6 9 10 27 -9
17 Newcastle 25 6 6 13 24 -18
18 Norwich 25 6 5 14 23 -20
19 Sunderland 25 5 5 15 20 -19
20 Aston Villa 25 3 7 15 16 -20
Vital Football Comment
Latest F1 News
Mercedes ready to play catch-up to Ferrari
Latest Vital Boxing News
Mystic Haye?
Write for Vital Football

Aston Villa Fixtures (view all)

Feb 14 2016 2:05PM : Liverpool (H)
Barclays Premier League
Feb 27 2016 3:00PM : Stoke City (a)
Barclays Premier League
Mar 1 2016 7:45PM : Everton (H)
Barclays Premier League
Mar 5 2016 3:00PM : Manchester City (a)
Barclays Premier League
Mar 12 2016 3:00PM : Tottenham Hotspur (H)
Barclays Premier League
Mar 19 2016 5:30PM : Swansea City (a)
Barclays Premier League

Recent Aston Villa Results (view all)

Vital Members League Table

RankNamePoints
1.Pride of Lions555
2.The Fear320
3.ClivetheVillan272
4.Fulford255
5.sirdennis197
6.JuanPabloAngel179
7.revdpete177
8.DeanoVilla149
9.Wurzel118
10.Silhillvilla95
The Vital Football Members League