Aston Villa - @VillasHerc in The Dressing Room Before Sunderland
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@VillasHerc in The Dressing Room Before Sunderland

*We join the lads preparing for their match against Sunderland, McLeish has a particular fire in his eyes*

McLeish: Well lads as you will all know O'Neill an' I have had a rivalry dating back years! I hate him! Hate him so much I wish I could take his glasses off snap them then put them back on him, upside-down! But I do know him inside out so I know EXACTLY what tactics we'll need for today.

*Albrighton raises his hand, McLeish nods at him to speak*

Albrighton: Is it to defend, aiming for a nil-nil if not a one one draw boss and to play the entire game as though we're in the lead regardless of whether we actually are?

*McLeish stares silently at Albrighton, his eyes dart to his clipboard and back*

McLeish: Have ye been readin' ma notes Marc! Cuz I tell you wha'....!

Albrighton: No! No boss... Sorry ... Um ... I mean not sorry because I didn't look at your notes, it's just .... Well....

N'Zogbia: Zis is what we do every single match regardless if it iz your Martin O'Neill we are playing!

Albrighton: .... Um .... Yeah.

*Mcleish ponders the statements until his phone rings, he picks it up and answers in a chirpy, friendly tone*

McLeish: Oohhh Martin!!! How are you fella!?

*the lads look at each other as McLeish pulls the phone away from his ear pulls a hateful face at and shakes his fist at it before returning it to his ear again adopting his 'nice' voice*

McLeish: Really? Well tha's grand........ Wha'? ..... Gabby? 12 million ye say? .... Sorry. No deal.

*McLeish hangs up looks at the phone and yells*

McLeish: I hate you Martin! I! Hate! You!!

Heskey: Wow boss, you must really hate him to turn down 12 million for Gabby, Mr.Lerner will be so mad....

McLeish: I didnae turn him down 'cause I hate him Emile. Though I do. Hate him. I'll be damned if I go to all the trouble of turning a right-footed, goalscoring striker into a defensive left midfielder and have someone come along and ruin all ma good work!

Gabby: Um... Does that mean I can score a goal boss? I mean I did promise the loyal fans that ....

McLeish: No! No goals for you Gabby, I dinnae ken how many times I must tell ye, if I see you 10 yards away from Steve I'll kill ye, he's a liability.

Warnock: Hey!

McLeish: What!? Ye are!

*Warnock bows his head without defence*




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The Journalist

Writer: Hercs Mail feedback, articles or suggestions

Date:Friday April 20 2012

Time: 2:32PM

Your Comments (oldest first)

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Lmao Hercs, great as usual :)
Green Villan
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20/04/2012 16:12:00

ROFL that's brilliant! "I'll be damned if I go to all the trouble of turning a right-footed, goalscoring striker into a defensive left midfielder and have someone come along and ruin all ma good work" - i laughed oput loud in the office when i rad that- brilliant m8 :)
thorpyuk
Report Abuse
20/04/2012 16:42:00

Have you got a hidden camera at Bodymoor Heath Hercs??? Don't forget that he has also been working on turning Heskey in to Villa and Englands version (IN HIS OWN WORDS) of Franz Beckenbauer???? McLeish isn't fit to manage Fulchester United. Although, we could do with their strike force of 'Shakin' Stevens' and 'Mick Hucknall from Simply Red' to save us from our current relegation peril!
heavy d
Report Abuse
20/04/2012 16:48:00

Yet again, thanks
Stourbridge Villan
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20/04/2012 17:28:00

Classic Hercs!
Pride of Lions
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21/04/2012 02:12:00

 

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