Vital Football

Latest Aston Villa News

@VillasHerc in the Dressing Room

@VillasHerc in the Dressing Room

*We join the lads preparing for their match against against Blackburn*

McLeish: Now lads, as you've heard many, many fans have been shouting that I need backing....

Albrighton: Um.... I don't think they're saying you need 'backing' boss I think....

McLeish: AHEM! ... As I was saying, it's time ye lads got behind me and play the way ye want me te play. Now Blackburn are nae doing to well so we'll focus on defending against them.

Gabby: Um ... Boss, do you think maybe we could attack against them? I used to like scoring goals and...

McLeish: Scoring goals!? Goals don't earn you draws Gabriel..

Albrighton: Well technically you could earn a...

McLeish: You know what I meant! Look, did yez see Spurs last week?

*the lads all nod*

McLeish: They go out there, all 'fancy dan' and 'Johnny Forward pass'

*the lads look at each other*

McLeish: ...They score some goals, then what happened?....... Well? Tha' was a question!

*N'Zogbia gingerly raises his hand*

N'Zogbia: Um.... Zey lost boss?

McLeish: Aye! They lost. Now I don't mind a boring loss, but an exciting loss!? No. Defence is the best defence is what I say.

Gabby: Isn't it 'attack is the....'

McLeish: No attacking! Now to ensure none of you try and score goals, Emile, you'll be replacing Bent up front.

*the lads all groan*

Heskey: Yes boss!

McLeish: Squander everything, run it to the corner from the off, trip over the ball if needs be.

Heskey: That won't be a problem boss.

McLeish: I know Emile, I know. Now let's go out there and defend!

*Heskey alone stands, he pumps his fist in the air*

Heskey: YEAAAH!!! Come on guys! .... Guys?

*the lads are all angrily staring and sneering at Heskey. Gabby and Albrighton are whispering to each other*

Gabby: Pssst ... I'm gonna try and score goals.

Albrighton: ... Me too.... If I can get past Emile.

*they nod at each other*

Win FREE pizza with Vital Football!
Select your team and get 50% off if they score twice.
www.papajohns.co.uk/football



Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

Writer:Hercs
Date:Friday March 2 2012
Time: 12:52PM

Comments

0
Brilliant - as always!
McGrath4Pope
02/03/2012 13:00:00
0
top one hercs, yet cannot give it a full broken ribs treatment as part of me thinks thats not far from the truth .... lol
badge73
02/03/2012 13:04:00
0
ROFL.... brilliant, really close to the truth probably too lolol. Wonder if any of the players read these? ;) We should put Heskers in central defense. With him in the box no goals will go in...
thorpyuk
02/03/2012 13:12:00
0
don't know how you keep thinking these up! ace!
The Fear
02/03/2012 14:28:00
0
"that wont be a problem boss" - brilliant, Hercs!
KevJoyBoy
02/03/2012 14:36:00
0
lol hercs excellent as always
Merlin128777
02/03/2012 16:14:00
0
'Johnny Forward pass' - loved it, hoe could we draw if we did such a thing.
Winsforvilla
02/03/2012 16:17:00
0
Quality once again Hercs......
Pride of Lions
02/03/2012 17:40:00
0
Quality once again Hercs......
Pride of Lions
02/03/2012 17:40:00
0
Genius and too true. Lol.
Villan444
02/03/2012 18:32:00
Page 1/2
  1. 1
  2. 2

Login to post a comment

Recent Aston Villa Articles

Who Will Aston Villa Face In 2016/17 (3/5/16)

With less than a handful of games remaining in the 2015/16 campaign, some promotions and relegations in the football pyramid are already known.

Villa To Break The Bank For McCormack?

It's being reported that Aston Villa are hugely interested in Fulham goal machine Ross McCormack.

Pearson In Limbo With Takeover

It was being being reported over the weekend that former Leicester City manager Nigel Pearson was now the favourite to take the Villa Park hotseat in the Championship next season.

Siegrist Takes Ainsworth Praise

Young goalkeeper Benjamin Siegrist had slipped off the radar lately.

Archived Vital Villa Articles

Vital Villa articles from

Site Journalists

J P Fear
Editor email
Profile
Mike Field
Editor email
Profile
Steve Wade
no email
Profile
Villa_Grizzly
no email
Profile
Turkish Penguin
no email
Profile
Glensider
no email
Profile
Chris Heath
no email
Profile
M Calucar
no email
Profile
JuanPablo Angel
no email
Profile

Current Poll (see more polls)

Watford MotM
Suggested By: Site Staff
Bunn5%
Clark51%
Lescott1%
Toner3%
Hutton2%
Westwood10%
Gana1%
Bacuna2%
Cissokho1%
Ayew18%
Gestede3%
Sub - Sanchez0%
Sub - Sinclair3%
ScoopDragon Premier League Network Sites

League Table

# Team P W D L Pts. GD
C Leicester City 36 22 11 3 77 30
2 Spurs 36 19 13 4 70 39
3 Arsenal 36 19 10 7 67 25
4 Man City 36 19 7 10 64 30
5 Man Utd 35 17 9 9 60 12
6 West Ham 35 15 14 6 59 17
7 Southampton 36 16 9 11 57 14
8 Liverpool 35 15 10 10 55 11
9 Chelsea 35 12 12 11 48 7
10 Stoke 36 13 9 14 48 -14
11 Everton 35 10 14 11 44 6
12 Watford 35 12 8 15 44 -6
13 Swansea 36 11 10 15 43 -13
14 WBA 36 10 11 15 41 -14
15 AFC Bournemouth 36 11 8 17 41 -20
16 Crystal Palace 36 10 9 17 39 -10
17 Newcastle 36 8 9 19 33 -25
18 Sunderland 35 7 11 17 32 -18
19 Norwich 35 8 7 20 31 -26
R Aston Villa 36 3 7 26 16 -45
Write for Vital Football
Latest F1 News
The messiest start of Kvyat's career
Latest Vital Boxing News
Hughie Fury Wins After Cut Stops Fight
The Vital Football Members League

Recent Aston Villa Results (view all)

Aston Villa Fixtures (view all)

May 7 2016 3:00PM : Newcastle United (H)
Barclays Premier League
May 15 2016 3:00PM : Arsenal (a)
Barclays Premier League

Vital Members League Table

RankNamePoints
1.Pride of Lions85
2.kefkat43
3.The Fear30
4.sirdennis22
5.Silhillvilla18
6.col812
7.DeanoVilla11
8.LORD RON SAUNDERS11
9.gator10
10.Thomas Holte10
Vital Football Comment