UK time is: 09:04:48
Vital Login
Social Login

Choose your club

Other Sites

Network Navigation

Vital Partners

'If It's Football, It's Vital'

Hercs in The Dressing Room Post Wigan

DISCLAIMER: I don't know, a little bit of snow and they shut the lot down don't they? Not me though, I struggled to work today, barefoot 21 miles in the snow to work and why? Because I have the British Bulldog spirit! That's why!

By 'barefoot' I of course mean 'in my car with the hot blowers on full and a large cup of warm coffee in a travel mug' and by 'British Bulldog Spirit' I mean ' an increasing level of debt off set by rising bills, cost of living (petrol in particular) and general family expenditure meaning an unpaid day off is out of the question'. With that in mind the following article is also full of exaggeration and bare-faced lies....

*We join the lads discussing their postponed match against Wigan, an excited Gabby enters*

Gabby: What a match!

Houllier: Mon Dieu! Gabriel sit down, cover up you are shaking and covered in ze snow.

Gabby: It was worth it boss, 3 points and 30 goals from me, that's a personal record.

Houllier: 30 ... Gabriel what are you talking about?

Gabby: I mean it's a shame we couldn't keep a clean sheet but you know, that's our defence at the moment.

A.Young: Gabby.... have you just played a match out there yourself? It was called off...

Gabby: Nah I wasn't out there by myself the unicorn set up most my goals .... and the magic seahorse.

A.Young: Magic sea... Gabby I think you may be delirious.

Gabby: I am Ashley, I'm over the moon, now its just time for more of my chest infection medicine.

*Gabby guzzles from a medicine bottle*

Downing: Whoa Gabby, how much of that are you taking like?

Gabby: Just what the bottle says, four spoons every two hours.

*Downing examines Gabby's medicine*

Downing: It says TWO spoons every FOUR hours man!

Gabby: Oh...... Yippeee !!!

A.Young: Um boss ... We have a problem.

*Gabby is performing unbalanced cartwheels and handsprings around the dressing room*

Houllier: I see zis Ashley ..... However will we be able to pin down John Carew and administer such an amount of medicine?

*the dressing room erupts with laughter*

Houllier: Seriously Richard, James pin him down.

*the dressing room erupts with laughter again*

Houllier: Stop zis laughing, I said pin him down!!




Use your social login to comment on front page articles. Login using you Facebook, Twitter, Google or LinkedIn accounts and have your say!



Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

The Journalist

Writer: Hercs Mail feedback, articles or suggestions

Date:Monday December 20 2010

Time: 1:45PM

Your Comments

quality
Stephen Jay Hawkings
Hercs, spreading some Xmas cheer...!
The Fear
Ahh laughing again, thank you Hercs!!
charizma
Merry Christmas Hercs, and thanks.
Stourbridge Villan
 

Have Your Say

Log in...
with your social network     OR     with your Vital account

Recent Aston Villa Articles

Okore Not Ready For Premiership Action (Tuesday October 21 2014)

Nathan Baker Picks Up Hamstring Injury (Tuesday October 21 2014)

Lambert Hoping Everton Was A Blip (Tuesday October 21 2014)

Sanchez Now Ready To Be Relied Upon (Tuesday October 21 2014)

Grealish Back To Nottingham? (Tuesday October 21 2014)

The Villa Times - 20/10/2014 (Monday October 20 2014)

Archived Aston Villa Articles

List All Vital Villa Articles
Have your say
Click here to suggest an article
Click here to suggest a poll

Vital Members League (view all)

1. Pride of Lions 626
2. The Fear 594
3. ClivetheVillan 531
4. thefacehead 428
5. HeathfieldRoad1874 231
6. sirdennis 201
7. kefkat 197
8. Villan Of The North 136
9. Clubpaver 117
10. DeanoVilla 111

League Results (view all)

League Table (view table)

Team P W D L GD Pts
9. Spurs 8 3 2 3 -1 11
10. Stoke 8 3 2 3 -1 11
11. Hull City 8 2 4 2 0 10
12. Aston Villa 8 3 1 4 -8 10
13. Everton 8 2 3 3 0 9
14. WBA 8 2 3 3 -1 9
15. Leicester City 8 2 3 3 -2 9

Breaking League News

Anderlecht v Arsenal Match Preview
Arsenal : 21/10/2014 21:30:00
Okore Not Ready For Premiership Action
Aston Villa : 21/10/2014 17:11:00
Nani Staying in Lisbon!
Man Utd : 21/10/2014 17:02:00
Nathan Baker Picks Up Hamstring Injury
Aston Villa : 21/10/2014 16:58:00
Match Day Moments - Maribor (h)
Chelsea : 21/10/2014 16:57:00

Current Site Poll (view all polls)

Which kick off time do you hate the most?
Suggested By:  JP Fear
Saturday 3pm 6%
Saturday 12.30/12:45 etc 10%
Saturday 5:30/5:45 etc 2%
Sunday early 6%
Sunday 4pm 5%
Monday 8pm 25%
All are fine with me 1%
All of them accept Sat 3pm! 45%