Vital Football

Latest Aston Villa News

Hercs in the Dressing Room before City

Hercs in the Dressing Room before City

.

We join the lads preparing for the match in the belly of the enemy*

Collins: Do you think there is a reason the boss has made us hold spears?

A.Young: Spears? You don't think that's a little less odd than him being on horseback? I mean how do you even get a horse into a dressing room anyway?

Pires: You know when I was in ze invincibles we would have all manner of animals in ze dressing room, giraffes, little chipmunks, 'ippos ... It was a crazy time ....

Houllier: Silence! Forth and fear no darkness! Arise! Arise, players of Villa! Spears shall be shaken, shields shall be splintered and Stephen will get 'is yellow card! A sword day .... a claret day .... ere the sun rises!

Warnock: *to Bannan* What ever happens, stay with me, I'll look after you.

*Bannan nods nervously, Houllier rides past the players hitting their spears with his sword as he goes*

Houllier: Play now!... Play now!... Play! Play to ruin and the world's ending!

*Houllier stops and points to the Birmingham City squad poster on the wall*

Houllier: Death!

All the lads: *echoing* Death!

Houllier: Death!

All the lads: *echoing* Death!

Houllier: DEATH!

Bannan & Herd: Death!

Houllier: Forth Villans!

*Delph hobbles rapidly out of the door screaming wildly as he goes, the lads look at each other with alarm*

A.Young: So...... Tactics boss?

Houllier: Ah yes *Houllier clears his throat* We're going with the 4-4-1-1, with you supporting the striker, two advanced wingers, I was thinking also that....

*10 minutes later Delph bursts through the door interrupting the tactical talk blood-soaked and exhausted*

Delph: Um.... Just to let you know.... City are probably going to forfeit the match.

Herd: Really? Is the weather that bad?

Delph: .....Yes..... The weather..... Also I'm going to need an alibi ..... and ..... Anyone seen my passport?

A.Young: Yeah, O'Neill burnt the passports of everyone he employed.

Delph: Right ...... Do any of you own a british based safe house?



Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

Writer:Hercs
Date:Wednesday December 1 2010
Time: 10:35AM

Comments

0
Delph my boy, you can come and stop with me mate, anytime : )
steff_the_villan
01/12/2010 11:39:00
0
AWSOMENESS
Ted 369
01/12/2010 13:59:00
0
Another enjoyable and entertaining piece of writing Hercs. Fabian Delph seems to feature prominently in many of your articles, clearly a favourite of yours I would think.
glensider
16/12/2010 07:00:00
Page 1/1
  1. 1

Login to post a comment

Recent Aston Villa Articles

The Vital Villa Player Of March

The Vital Villa player of the month for March results are now in:

EFL Cup To Fast Track Video Assistance?

It's been reported this week that the Football Association could now fast track video assistant referee help for match day officials in the League Cup.

Bacuna To Serve A Suspension This Week - 30/3/17

Aston Villa's Leandro Bacuna will be out of action this week as he serves an automatic suspension.

Officials - Aston Villa v Norwich (1/4/17)

The Football League have now announced the Match Day officials that will take charge of the game between Aston Villa and Norwich City this Saturday.

Archived Vital Villa Articles

Vital Villa articles from

Site Journalists

J P Fear
Editor email
Profile
Mike Field
Editor email
Profile
Steve Wade
no email
Profile
Villa_Grizzly
no email
Profile
Turkish Penguin
no email
Profile
Glensider
no email
Profile
Chris Heath
no email
Profile
M Calucar
no email
Profile
JuanPablo Angel
no email
Profile

Current Poll (see more polls)

Aston Villa v Norwich City will:
Suggested By: Mystic Mug
Win72%
Lose5%
Draw23%
ScoopDragon Publishing Entire League Network of Sites

League Table

# Team P W D L Pts. GD
1 Newcastle 38 24 6 8 78 38
2 Brighton 38 23 8 7 77 30
3 Huddersfield 37 22 5 10 71 4
4 Leeds Utd 38 21 6 11 69 16
5 Reading 38 20 7 11 67 2
6 Sheff Wed 38 18 8 12 62 9
7 Fulham 38 16 13 9 61 19
8 Norwich 38 16 9 13 57 9
9 Preston 38 15 12 11 57 6
10 Derby County 38 14 11 13 53 3
11 Barnsley 38 14 9 15 51 0
12 Aston Villa 38 13 12 13 51 0
13 Cardiff 38 14 9 15 51 -1
14 Brentford 38 14 8 16 50 3
15 Q.P.R. 38 14 8 16 50 -5
16 Wolves 37 12 9 16 45 -2
17 Ipswich 38 10 15 13 45 -9
18 Birmingham 38 11 12 15 45 -16
19 Bristol City 38 11 8 19 41 -3
20 Forest 38 11 8 19 41 -11
21 Burton 38 10 11 17 41 -14
22 Blackburn 38 9 13 16 40 -11
23 Wigan 38 8 10 20 34 -13
24 Rotherham 38 4 5 29 17 -54
Vital Football Comment
Latest F1 News
McLaren worst car on the grid according to Alonso
Latest Vital Boxing News
Bellew Appointed WBC Emeritus Champion Status
Write for Vital Football

Recent Aston Villa Results (view all)

Aston Villa Fixtures (view all)

Apr 1 2017 3:00PM : Norwich City (H)
Sky Bet Championship
Apr 4 2017 7:45PM : Queens Park Rangers (H)
Sky Bet Championship
Apr 8 2017 3:00PM : Burton Albion (a)
Sky Bet Championship
Apr 15 2017 3:00PM : Reading (H)
Sky Bet Championship
Apr 17 2017 2:45PM : Fulham (a)
Sky Bet Championship
Apr 23 2017 12:00PM : Birmingham City (H)
Sky Bet Championship

Vital Members League Table

RankNamePoints
1.The Fear436
2.HeathfieldRoad1874344
3.Pride of Lions342
4.sirdennis329
5.JuanPabloAngel309
6.Sasquatch269
7.Silhillvilla192
8.Melon Donkey172
9.BodyButter164
10.mike_field148
The Vital Football Members League