Vital Football

Latest Aston Villa News

Hercs in the Dressing Room Before Arsenal

Hercs in the Dressing Room Before Arsenal

*We join the lads preparing for the Arsenal match, Houllier enters*

Houllier: Bonjour ma petit pois!

*the lads groan 'hello' back mostly through injury*

Houllier: Look, I know we are ravaged by ze injuries and I 'ave yet again addressed ze situation. I 'ave managed another international star signing boys.

Collins: Oooh ooh boss is it Juniniho? I heard Juniniho was going to sign?

Houllier: What? No. Far bigger than him! I shall call him in. GEEERRRAAAARRRD!

*The lads gasp loudly with excitement*

Depardieu: Bonjour!

Gabby: Stevie? Hi, welcome to the team.

A.Young: Gabby, that's Gerard Depardieu.... In a Villa kit.

Gabby: Oh.... Right ... Who?

A.Young: You know, he was in Hamlet, Asterix and Obelix and Cyrano de Bergerac.

Gabby: The scottish bloke? He's still alive? I thought ....

A.Young: No Gabriel, no. He's an old french actor. Boss are you slowly turning us into a french old boy's club?

Houllier: What!? I'm 'ow you say outraged ... Outraged!

Pires: Outrage!

Depardieu: Outrage!

*There is a knock at the door. Houllier answers it*

Wenger: Gerard ... Gerard .... Robert. So are we ready to party?

Houllier: Not now Arsene.

Wenger: Not now? But I am wearing my party shoes.

*Wenger points to his shiny wingtips as Ashley Young approches*

Houllier: Um ..... Yes goodluck to you in the upcoming match too Mr.Wenger.

Wenger: Match? What is this match you are speaking of? I have not come about a match I am here about ze .....

*Houllier smiles and slams the door*

Wenger: Party..... But ... I have a dance.

*Wenger does a Bruce Forsyth-esque tap dance at the closed door. Finishing with jazz hands then dropping his shoulders and sloping off.*



Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

Writer:Hercs
Date:Saturday November 27 2010
Time: 11:49AM

Login to post a comment

Recent Aston Villa Articles

Johnstone In Team Of The Week (12/12/17)

Aston Villa are represented in the latest Football League team of the week that has been selected after this week's action.

Spurs To Re-call Josh Onomah In January?

Surely not? I can't see he's ready for the top half of the Premiership, can you?

The Villa Times - 11/12/2017

The latest news and views on Aston Villa via the uno fish ial one..

Aston Villa Fans Disappointed Reactions To Millwall Draw

Fan reactions and a few tweets following the 0-0 v Millwall...

Aston Villa Archived Articles

Vital Villa articles from

Site Journalists

J P Fear
Editor email
Profile
Mike Field
Editor email
Profile
Steve Wade
no email
Profile
JuanPablo Angel
no email
Profile
Glensider
no email
Profile

Current Poll (see more polls)

Millwall MotM
Suggested By: Site Staff
Johnstone74%
Hutton4%
Samba0%
Chester0%
Taylor1%
Snodgrass0%
Whelan8%
Lansbury1%
Adomah0%
Onomah1%
Davis1%
Sub - Grealish2%
Sub - Elmohamady1%
Sub - Elphick7%
ScoopDragon Publishing Entire League Network of Sites
Write for Vital Football
Latest F1 News
Currently all quiet on Hamilton's contract
Latest Vital Boxing News
Brook Back in Action in March 2018
The Vital Football Members League

Recent Aston Villa Results (view all)

Aston Villa Fixtures (view all)

Vital Members League Table

RankNamePoints
1.JuanPabloAngel172
2.Pride of Lions149
3.HeathfieldRoad1874139
4.The Fear136
5.BodyButter123
6.sirdennis99
7.Villan Of The North69
8.Melon Donkey68
9.McParlandTheGreat60
10.mike_field59
Vital Football Comment