Hercs in the Dressing Room post Burnley
*We join the lads shattered but celebrating their win against Burnley, Heskey walks through the door. The room falls silent.*
Heskey: Hey guys! What's up? Where's the partying?
A.Young: Emile.... You've gone too far this time.
*Heskey crouches down to tighten the buckle on his sandles*
Heskey: Come again?
A.Young: You. Dressed as Jesus.
Heskey: Dressed as who?
*Heskey adjusts his thorned crown*
Heskey: Never heard of him, what is he one of your 'grime' or 'dubstep' people? I've told you before I don't listen to that nonsense.
Collins: Come off it Emile, we all know you're acting the 'saviour'
Heskey: I don't know what you're talking about, I'm just here to score goals lads.
*Downing enters, he stops in his stride to stare at Emile*
Downing: Well, this is embarrassin' like.
*Downing and Heskey look each other up and down*
Heskey: So.... Are you going to change or shall I?
Downing: I will pal I've got some other clothes in ma locker like.
*Minutes later Downing is changed and approaches the lads again*
A.Young: Flash Gordon!?
A.Young: I know you know! 'Saviour of the universe' ... 'he saves everyone of us'
Downing: Your words, not mine like.
*Friedel enters, he stops. Downing and Friedel look each other up and down.*
Downing: Oooh No, I'm not changing again.
*Albrighton has sat down with Sidwell, Delph, NRC and Warnock*
Albrighton: So what do we do here in the hall of maim? Do we make greetings cards anytime? My grandma's birthday's coming up and she likes cats so I was thinking of making one with a kitten playing with a ball of...
Delph: Hold up! First off, yes we sometimes make grettings cards, secondly why are you sitting with us?
Albrighton: I got a red card, 'I'm down' look.
*Albrighton holds the red card aloft, a drooling Delph leans toward it finger outsretched, Sidwell smacks Delph's hand and he comes to his senses*
Sidwell: You barely touched him. Be gone.
Albrighton: I got a straight red, lucky he survived he is, vicious I am, deadly.
NRC: What? You were just the last man!
Albrighton: Yeah, last man standing, why he'll be probably never walk again...
*Wade Elliot knocks and enters*
Elliot: Hi guys, good match. Tough break picking up a red card there Marc. It's was a pleasure playing against you.
*Sidwell, NRC, Warnock & Delph all stare wide-eyed at Albrighton*
Albrighton: Fine, I'll move.