Vital Football

Latest Aston Villa News

Hercs in The Dressing Room Pre Spurs

Hercs in The Dressing Room Pre Spurs



*We join the lads preparing for Spurs, Houllier enters*

Houllier: Bonjour ma deja vus

*the lads look at each other, Houllier stops in shock as he eyes NRC, Sidwell and Delph at a table*

Houllier: What is zis!? I will not have gambling in ze dressing room!

NRC: Oh, don't worry boss, it's just a bit of 'Go Fish' and we're not using money...

*Houllier takes Delph's hand of cards off him and examines them*

Houllier: And ... These ... zey are .... FIFA Yellow cards?

Sidwell: Yeah, we added the suits and numbers ourselves.

*they all grin proudly*

Houllier: You have amassed an 'ole deck of yellow playing cards between you!?

Delph: No.

*Houllier sighs with relief*

NRC: Two.

Delph: Well, with no jokers.

*NRC waves the unopened other box of cards*

Houllier: Mon Dieu, zis is terrible!

Sidwell: Not really, I mean most standard games don't use jokers anyway and.....

Houllier: Non! Zat you 'ave zis number of cards!

NRC: Yeah well, we were thinking of springing for another one but we thought three decks would just encourage cheating so...

Houllier: Non zere are too many!

NRC: Oh....

Delph: Too many? But how would you remember you've played a match if you don't get a yellow card?

Houllier: With your memory Fabian.

Delph: Oh yeah, hadn't really thought about it like that.

Sidwell: Hang on, are you saying you can actually play a match and NOT get a yellow card?

Houllier: Yes... Well, no, not for you Steve but for most players zis is possible.

Heskey: Am I getting the goals in today as per boss?

Houllier: Oui Emile.

Heskey: Good, I've been working on a few celebrations, what do you think of this one?

*Heskey pulls a rubber Carew mask from his shorts and lifts his shirt to reveal the word 'Finally!' on his vest.*

Heskey: See what I did ther John? I made it look like YOU scored for once.

*Carew seethes*

Heskey: Whoa now John .... You wouldn't punch yourself in the face would you?

*minutes later*

Paramedic: We're losing him!

Win FREE pizza with Vital Football!
Select your team and get 50% off if they score twice.
www.papajohns.co.uk/football



Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

Writer:Hercs
Date:Friday October 1 2010
Time: 12:41PM

Comments

0
*Heskey pulls a rubber Carew mask from his shorts and lifts his shirt to reveal the word 'Finally!' on his vest.* priceless
intox
01/10/2010 13:10:00
0
Can you get those masks in the club shop?
Villa b
01/10/2010 13:35:00
0
Yes Villa b, but they're unavailable most the time then half the time they are there they don't look right.
Hercs
01/10/2010 13:40:00
0
Superb as ever mate.
revdpete
01/10/2010 13:51:00
0
Another good 'un Hercs. Looking forward to the dressing room after the Tottenham game article, following another three pointer for the claret and blues.
glensider
01/10/2010 17:27:00
0
a laugh a second, thanks Hercs
Charizma
02/10/2010 14:33:00
Page 1/1
  1. 1

Login to post a comment

Recent Aston Villa Articles

Who Will Aston Villa Face In 2016/17 (30/5/16)

All promotions and relegations for the season of 2015/16 have been confirmed, so the full make up of the Championship for 2016/17 is now known.

Nigel Pearson NOT Aston Villa Bound - Rammed

Phew (for me) and doh (for others!) Nigel Pearson has gone to Derby County

Di Matteo Appointment Close

Late yesterday evening it was reported that further talks between Chairman Steve Hollis and Roberto Di Matteo had taken place...

No Villa Regrets For Amavi

French Left back Jordan Amavi has said he has no regrets about joining Aston Villa last summer, and he's pretty down to earth when it comes to his thoughts...

Archived Vital Villa Articles

Vital Villa articles from

Site Journalists

J P Fear
Editor email
Profile
Mike Field
Editor email
Profile
Steve Wade
no email
Profile
Villa_Grizzly
no email
Profile
Turkish Penguin
no email
Profile
Glensider
no email
Profile
Chris Heath
no email
Profile
M Calucar
no email
Profile
JuanPablo Angel
no email
Profile

Current Poll (see more polls)

Roberto Di Matteo would be:
Suggested By: JP Fear
A great appointment30%
A good appointment but I'd prefer a.n.other39%
An average appointment16%
No thanks appointment!15%
ScoopDragon Premier League Network Sites

League Table

# Team P W D L Pts. GD
C Leicester City 38 23 12 3 81 32
2 Arsenal 38 20 11 7 71 29
3 Spurs 38 19 13 6 70 34
4 Man City 38 19 9 10 66 30
5 Man Utd 38 19 9 10 66 14
6 Southampton 38 18 9 11 63 18
7 West Ham 38 16 14 8 62 14
8 Liverpool 38 16 12 10 60 13
9 Stoke 38 14 9 15 51 -14
10 Chelsea 38 12 14 12 50 6
11 Everton 38 11 14 13 47 4
12 Swansea 38 12 11 15 47 -10
13 Watford 38 12 9 17 45 -10
14 WBA 38 10 13 15 43 -14
15 Crystal Palace 38 11 9 18 42 -12
16 AFC Bournemouth 38 11 9 18 42 -22
17 Sunderland 38 9 12 17 39 -14
R Newcastle 38 9 10 19 37 -21
R Norwich 38 9 7 22 34 -28
R Aston Villa 38 3 8 27 17 -49
The Vital Football Members League
Latest F1 News
Ricciardo screwed for second week running
Latest Vital Boxing News
Price Wins by Second Round Knockout
Vital Football Comment

Recent Aston Villa Results (view all)

Aston Villa Fixtures (view all)

Vital Members League Table

RankNamePoints
1.Pride of Lions904
2.The Fear541
3.kefkat363
4.sirdennis304
5.Fulford273
6.Lerner Out!250
7.JuanPabloAngel228
8.glensider205
9.Silhillvilla186
10.DeanoVilla181
Write for Vital Football