Date:Friday September 24 2010
We join the lads preparing for their match against Wolves, Delph is visibly upset*
A.Young: Don't worry too much about it Fabian, I'm sure you'll get the chance to play Wolves in the future.
Delph: It's not just that (sniff), look at this ...
*Delph holds up the fixture list to Young*
Delph: Stoke, Bolton, Blackburn, Wolves I'm missing the lot!
A.Young: You know Fabian some people would consider themselves lucky not to be playing these matches. But I'm sure Gabby is just as gutted as you. Eh Gabby?
Gabby: uh .... Yeah ... Gutted, my back is killing me.
A.Young: Back? I thought it was your calf?
*Gabby rubs his arm*
Gabby: Um ... Yeah, my calf ... Very sore.
A.Young: That's your elbow!
Gabby: Look I'm just injured alright!
*Gabby runs out of the dressing room full pelt*
Collins: I'm with Gabby, I 'relish the physical challenge' as much as the next man but I'm beginning to forget what I look like without a black eye or head bandage or neck collar. I'm like that guy who's always faking his injuries.
A.Young: Avid Merrion?
Collins: No, no, the one with he big hat and glasses, always wears purple....
Heskey: .... The Archbishop of Canterbury?
Collins: Yeah, yeah that's the one.
Heskey: James, that's not a neck brace, it's a dog collar...
Collins: Hey, I didn't judge Stan Collymore, I won't judge that guy either.
Heskey: No, it's not anything like that James he....
Collins: I don't want to know Emile, his business is his business.
Houllier: Bonjure ma eau de toilletes!
*The lads all look at each other*
Houllier: I am 'ow you say a sociable boss, 'ere I 'ave a joke for you. What is ze difference between running through a minefield and our fixture list?
*Houllier scans the room taking in the shrugs of the players*
*The dressing room erupts with laughter.*
Houllier: Well I suppose you are less likely to lose a limb in ze minefield. All I ask of you is to win every remaining match zis season.
*The dressing room erupts with laughter*
Houllier: I stopped joking at 'nothing'.
*The dressing room erupts with laughter once more*
*The dressing room falls silent and the players look at each other uncomfortably*
Houllier: Now Emile, you will play upfront and score all the goals, Stephen you will be playing left back.
Houllier (mutters under his breath): For Coventry
Warnock: What was that boss?
Date:Friday September 24 2010
Lambert On Cole Omission, & Zoggy Praise (Thursday July 24 2014)
Lambert - We Were Excellent (Thursday July 24 2014)
FC Dallas 0-2 Aston Villa (Thursday July 24 2014)
I Delphinetly Want A New Deal But Luna's Off (Wednesday July 23 2014)
Gardner To Make 2014-15 His Year (Wednesday July 23 2014)
Roncrete's Sett(led) At Villa (Wednesday July 23 2014)
Vlaar Bar (Wednesday July 23 2014)
Lambert Pleased With Workout So Far (Tuesday July 22 2014)
Taxi for Tonev (Tuesday July 22 2014)
Full Squad For Texan Tour (Monday July 21 2014)
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|2. Aston Villa||0||0||0||0||+0||0|
|5. Crystal Palace||0||0||0||0||+0||0|
|7. Hull City||0||0||0||0||+0||0|
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