Date:Friday April 30 2010
*We join the lads preparing for their clash against Man City. MON is visibly confident*
MON: Chins up lads, we can win this one with ease, They're playing a keeper from the Faroe Islands, as far as I know all that lives there are sheep. They don't even have poseable thumbs! On top of that my scouts have reliably informed me that no-one outside of the british isles can even play football to a worthwhile level.
Delfouneso: What about Messi?
MON: Messy? What is this some of your 'jive', street lingo Nathan?
Delfouneso: What? No boss he's a ...
MON: I'll have none of your hippity hop nonsense in here young man. And...
A.Young: Actually boss the people of the Faroe Islands are considered under the Kindom of Denmark and...
MON: Denmark!? Pah! Who's ever won anything with a danish keeper?
Milner: Besides boss, they've made an emergency loan like.
MON: Emergency loan!? Even better!
*MON is ecstatic jumping on the spot. The lads are confused. MON addresses their confusion*
MON: Two words. Gabor. Kiraly.
*The lads all gasp with horror*
Gabby: I still have jogging trouser nightmares.
*Petrov has fallen to his knees the palms of his hands pressed firmly on his temples, eyes crushed closed*
Petrov: The sweat pants! .... The sweat pants!
MON: Yes! It'll cause uncertainty and no doubt terrible 'keeping. Who is the unlucky player?
Milner: Marton Fulop.
MON: Martin Fuller?
NRC: Fulop boss Fulop.
MON: Full of it am I Nigel!? See if you play again!?!
NRC: What!? ...I didn't..... I mean .. I said.
MON: Not the smart mouth now are you!? Anyway, enough of how we are going to easily defeat Man City. It's time for me to announce the squad.
*MON gestures to some closed claret and blue curtains aside a golden rope*
MON: Now I'm going to let the fringe players have a go as promised.
*The likes of Sidwell, Beye and Ciaran Clark look at each other wide-eyed with excitement*
Robertson: Dah da-da-da-da daaaaaaah!
*MON pulls the golden rope to John Robertson's 'fanfare' the curtains open and the lads lean in to see the team*
Sidwell: Hey! This side is unchanged from the last two games.
MON: Oh but is it Steve?
MON: ... Oh but is it!?
MON: OK ... It is.
Beye: But boss you said the fringe players would....
MON: That I did Habib my good man. First team, under your chairs you will find combs with which you can comb yourself forward a fringe.
*The first team do as such combing their hair forward as requested, Collins, Gabby and Friedel in particular look upset.*
MON: Not to worry lads, for you I have these.
*MON produces a number of wigs.*
MON: Here you go.
*MON hands Friedel a 'dreadlock' wig, Gabby the wig of a '60's news anchorman' and Collins a 'lustrous long curly blonde' wig, he hands thebox to the rest of the short haired players, Cuellar is still struggling to comb a fringe into his hair with Petrov helping*
Cuellar: I cannae do it cap'ain I doon't have the appropriate comb!
*Clark jumps to his feet with an expression of invention*
Clarke: Hey I have a fringe does that mean I can...
*Robertson appears beside Clark deftly snipping off his fringe with barber's scissors.*
Clarke: My fringe!
Sidwell: This is nonsense! You said fringe players anyway not 'fringed'
MON: Yes, but that wouldn't have really worked for the joke would it.
*The first team laugh whilst the fringe players scowl. Brad Friedel produces a guitar and begins singing 'Buffalo Soldier' the lads all unite and sing along*
Date:Friday April 30 2010
Bent Joins Brighton On Loan, Robinson Returns (Wednesday November 26 2014)
U21s - Wolves 0-1 Villa (Wednesday November 26 2014)
Vital Villa Man Of The Match v Saints (Home) (Wednesday November 26 2014)
Villa Fan - Rant Mode On... (Tuesday November 25 2014)
AVFC: Relegation Super Storm? (Tuesday November 25 2014)
Worst Home Attendance For AVFC Since 1999 (Tuesday November 25 2014)
Lambert On Big Pluses Of Saints Draw (Tuesday November 25 2014)
Stats: Aston Villa v Southampton (Monday November 24 2014)
Villa Aren't Carrying The Can For Vlaar Contract (Sunday November 23 2014)
Lambert Wants More Progress Against Southampton (Sunday November 23 2014)
|1.||Pride of Lions||878|
|West Ham||0||-||0||Aston Villa|
|Aston Villa||0||-||2||Man City|
|15. Crystal Palace||12||3||3||6||-4||12|
|16. Aston Villa||12||3||3||6||-11||12|
|17. Hull City||12||2||5||5||-3||11|
|18. Leicester City||12||2||4||6||-7||10|
|Bent Joins Brighton On Loan, Robinson Returns
» Aston Villa : 26/11/2014 16:34:00
|U21s - Wolves 0-1 Villa
» Aston Villa : 26/11/2014 16:23:00
|Register & Have Your Say on Vital Swansea
» Swansea : 26/11/2014 16:00:00
|Football Aid 2015 - Play at White Hart Lane!
» Spurs : 26/11/2014 14:29:00
|New Poll: 3rd Home Win In a Row vs Crystal Palace?
» Swansea : 26/11/2014 14:00:00