UK time is: 23:44:18
Vital Login
Social Login

Choose your club

Other Sites

Network Navigation

Vital Partners

'If It's Football, It's Vital'

Hercs In The Dressing Room Post Birmingham City

*We join the lads celebrating their victory over Birmingham City*

MON: Well another well deserved victory lads!

*The dressing room erupts with laughter*

MON: I tell you if City weren't even going to try I don't know why they bothered turning up.

*The dressing room erupts with laughter again*

MON: I'm on a roll, how about this one? ... Gabriel Agbonlahor walks into a bar..... Penalty.

*The dressing room roars with laughter, Gabby steps forward grinning*

Gabby: Pint please.

*The lads all laugh again, Gabby looks confused maintaining a polite, waiting smile*

Gabby: ..... Oooh yeah the boss is here, half a shandy please?

*The lads have all fallen silent and are staring at Gabby*

MON: Gabriel ... You're not actually in a bar....

*Gabby hasn't heard, he's disco dancing in the silence*

MON: Gabriel!

Gabby: Yes boss? Bit of a sausage fest in here isn't it?

MON: You're not in a bar.

Gabby: But you just said.

MON: It was a joke. Now Brad, excellent game you're truly world class, really turned back the years you did, like a machine you are.

*a battered and bruised Friedel raises one of his steaming gloves with a thumb aloft whilst still breathing into his oxygen mask.*

MON: And Emile you were an inch away from being a hero.

Milner: A hero like me boss like?

MON: Yes James a hero like you, Oh Emile, one day the fans will shout your name from the stands without expletives on either end of it.

Heskey: I live in hope boss.

MON: Now get on the no goal chair.

Heskey: but boss Gabby and John didn't....

MON: Chair!

*Heskey skulks to the chair facing the wall, there is a knock at the door, it's Roger Johnson, he's fuming.*

MON: Ah Roger, here to apologise to Gabriel over your horror tackle?

Johnson: Disgrace!

MON: Quite right, you are I mean to take a player down in the box like that.

Johnson: What!? It was never a penalty, I got the ball.

MON: I'll say you've got some balls disputing that blatant penalty.

Johnson: What!?..... I didn't mean .... But...... I ..... Disgrace!

MON: Agreed. Shame on you.

*MON slams the door and turns back to the lads, mumbling and the loud cries of 'Disgrace!' can be heard through the door.*

MON: Now lads, it's time for a sing song. My old man said be a City fan he said ... Everybody.....

*The lads all join in jovially*

Gabby: The service here is rubbish.



Happy Derby Day One and All!




Use your social login to comment on front page articles. Login using you Facebook, Twitter, Google or LinkedIn accounts and have your say!



Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

The Journalist

Writer: Hercs Mail feedback, articles or suggestions

Date:Monday April 26 2010

Time: 1:39PM

Your Comments (oldest first)

Change to most recent first
I agree.....been 'off colour' lately, but back witha bang - TOP DRAWER! ...Disgrace!
YatesyVillain
Report Abuse
27/04/2010 06:26:00

Gabby walks into a bar.....penalty! Brilliant
longbridgelion
Report Abuse
27/04/2010 21:44:00

just love the image of the no goal chair!
The Fear
Report Abuse
28/04/2010 15:18:00

 

Have Your Say

Log in...
with your social network     OR     with your Vital account

Recent Aston Villa Articles

Burke Heads To Notts County (Thursday March 26 2015)

Kinsella Heads To Luton Town (Thursday March 26 2015)

Cole Praises Delph's Qualities (Thursday March 26 2015)

AVFC - The Relegation Battle Rages On (Thursday March 26 2015)

Bacuna Praises Defensive Duo (Wednesday March 25 2015)

Archived Aston Villa Articles

List All Vital Villa Articles
Have your say
Click here to suggest an article
Click here to suggest a poll
ScoopDragon Premier League Network Sites

Vital Members League (view all)

1. Pride of Lions 938
2. ClivetheVillan 728
3. The Fear 561
4. kefkat 372
5. thefacehead 352
6. sirdennis 286
7. DeanoVilla 273
8. HeathfieldRoad1874 246
9. Juan Mourep 191
10. Villan Of The North 189

League Results (view all)

League Table (view table)

Team P W D L GD Pts
13. Everton 30 8 10 12 -4 34
14. WBA 30 8 9 13 -12 33
15. Hull City 30 6 10 14 -12 28
16. Aston Villa 30 7 7 16 -20 28
17. Sunderland 30 4 14 12 -21 26
18. Burnley 30 5 10 15 -23 25
19. Q.P.R. 30 6 4 20 -23 22

Breaking League News

Do Tiendalli & Richards' Futures Lie At Swansea?
Swansea : 26/03/2015 20:53:00
Sakho on Non-EU Players
West Ham : 26/03/2015 19:28:01
Appiah With Reading Spell
Crystal Palace : 26/03/2015 19:16:00
Williams amp; Fryers Make Ipswich Move
Crystal Palace : 26/03/2015 19:13:00
Burke Heads To Notts County
Aston Villa : 26/03/2015 19:07:01

Current Site Poll (view all polls)

Swansea MotM
Suggested By:  MF
Guzan 11%
Bacuna 0%
Okore 2%
Clark 33%
Hutton 0%
N'Zogbia 1%
Cleverley 0%
Delph 46%
Sinclair 0%
Benteke 0%
Agbonlahor 2%
Sub - Sanchez 4%
Sub - Westwood 1%
Sub - Weimann 0%