Vital Football

Latest Aston Villa News

Hercs In The Dressing Room Post Birmingham City

Hercs In The Dressing Room Post Birmingham City

*We join the lads celebrating their victory over Birmingham City*

MON: Well another well deserved victory lads!

*The dressing room erupts with laughter*

MON: I tell you if City weren't even going to try I don't know why they bothered turning up.

*The dressing room erupts with laughter again*

MON: I'm on a roll, how about this one? ... Gabriel Agbonlahor walks into a bar..... Penalty.

*The dressing room roars with laughter, Gabby steps forward grinning*

Gabby: Pint please.

*The lads all laugh again, Gabby looks confused maintaining a polite, waiting smile*

Gabby: ..... Oooh yeah the boss is here, half a shandy please?

*The lads have all fallen silent and are staring at Gabby*

MON: Gabriel ... You're not actually in a bar....

*Gabby hasn't heard, he's disco dancing in the silence*

MON: Gabriel!

Gabby: Yes boss? Bit of a sausage fest in here isn't it?

MON: You're not in a bar.

Gabby: But you just said.

MON: It was a joke. Now Brad, excellent game you're truly world class, really turned back the years you did, like a machine you are.

*a battered and bruised Friedel raises one of his steaming gloves with a thumb aloft whilst still breathing into his oxygen mask.*

MON: And Emile you were an inch away from being a hero.

Milner: A hero like me boss like?

MON: Yes James a hero like you, Oh Emile, one day the fans will shout your name from the stands without expletives on either end of it.

Heskey: I live in hope boss.

MON: Now get on the no goal chair.

Heskey: but boss Gabby and John didn't....

MON: Chair!

*Heskey skulks to the chair facing the wall, there is a knock at the door, it's Roger Johnson, he's fuming.*

MON: Ah Roger, here to apologise to Gabriel over your horror tackle?

Johnson: Disgrace!

MON: Quite right, you are I mean to take a player down in the box like that.

Johnson: What!? It was never a penalty, I got the ball.

MON: I'll say you've got some balls disputing that blatant penalty.

Johnson: What!?..... I didn't mean .... But...... I ..... Disgrace!

MON: Agreed. Shame on you.

*MON slams the door and turns back to the lads, mumbling and the loud cries of 'Disgrace!' can be heard through the door.*

MON: Now lads, it's time for a sing song. My old man said be a City fan he said ... Everybody.....

*The lads all join in jovially*

Gabby: The service here is rubbish.

Happy Derby Day One and All!

Date:Monday April 26 2010
Time: 1:39PM


I agree.....been 'off colour' lately, but back witha bang - TOP DRAWER! ...Disgrace!
27/04/2010 06:26:00
Gabby walks into a bar.....penalty! Brilliant
27/04/2010 21:44:00
just love the image of the no goal chair!
The Fear
28/04/2010 15:18:00
Page 1/1
  1. 1

Login to post a comment


Recent Aston Villa Articles

Villa v Watford - Teamsheets!

Aston Villa are at Villa Park with Watford the visitors for the latest league match. This is a 3pm kick-off and the line ups have been confirmed.

Something For The Weekend (512)

From Rotterdam to Götterdämmerung, in a generation?

Lescott Talks Watford & Injury Update

Joleon Lescott has spoken about Watford and Jores Okore and we also have the weekly injury update.

Audio - Richards & Gregory Talk Villa

Skipper Micah Richards has spoken about the first time he realised Villa were in trouble, and former gaffer John Gregory gives his thoughts.

Archived Vital Villa Articles

Vital Villa articles from

Site Journalists

J P Fear
Mike Field
Steve Wade
Turkish Penguin
Chris Heath
M Calucar
JuanPablo Angel

Current Poll (see more polls)

Aston Villa v Watford will:
Suggested By: Mystic Mug
ScoopDragon Premier League Network Sites

League Table

# Team P W D L Pts. GD
1 Leicester City 13 8 4 1 28 8
2 Man Utd 13 8 3 2 27 10
3 Man City 13 8 2 3 26 14
4 Arsenal 13 8 2 3 26 12
5 Spurs 13 6 6 1 24 13
6 West Ham 13 6 3 4 21 4
7 Everton 13 5 5 3 20 8
8 Southampton 13 5 5 3 20 5
9 Liverpool 13 5 5 3 20 2
10 Crystal Palace 13 6 1 6 19 1
11 Stoke 13 5 4 4 19 -1
12 WBA 13 5 2 6 17 -5
13 Watford 13 4 4 5 16 -2
14 Swansea 13 3 5 5 14 -4
15 Chelsea 13 4 2 7 14 -6
16 Norwich 13 3 3 7 12 -8
17 Newcastle 13 2 4 7 10 -12
18 Sunderland 13 2 3 8 9 -12
19 AFC Bournemouth 13 2 3 8 9 -13
20 Aston Villa 13 1 2 10 5 -14
Vital Football Comment
Latest F1 News
2015 - Abu Dhabi Grand Prix - FP2
Latest Vital Boxing News
DeGale Looking for Unification Bouts
Write for Vital Football

Aston Villa Fixtures (view all)

Nov 28 2015 3:00PM : Watford (H)
Barclays Premier League
Dec 5 2015 3:00PM : Southampton (a)
Barclays Premier League
Dec 13 2015 1:30PM : Arsenal (H)
Barclays Premier League
Dec 19 2015 5:30PM : Newcastle United (a)
Barclays Premier League
Dec 26 2015 3:00PM : West Ham United (H)
Barclays Premier League
Dec 28 2015 3:00PM : Norwich City (a)
Barclays Premier League

Vital Members League Table

1.Pride of Lions1069
2.The Fear626
The Vital Football Members League