UK time is: 13:24:27
Vital Login
Social Login

Choose your club

Other Sites

Network Navigation

Vital Partners

'If It's Football, It's Vital'

Hercs In The Dressing Room 'When Rumours Abound'

*We join MON who's been called for showdown talks with Randy Lerner*

Lerner: Maaaaarty! Long time no see, how's it hangin'?

MON: You're .... not mad about the 7-1?

Lerner: Ah seven one shmeven one. Hell so what if they scored a touchdown and conversion? That's football right?

MON: Well, not exac....

Lerner: Anyway you're hear about Jimmy Milner, I done had a 'grrrrrrreat!' offer for him as Tony the tiger would say.

MON: I didn't realise you had Tony the tiger in America.

*Lerner looks confused*

Lerner: How'd you mean? I take Tony with me everywhere.

*Lerner points to an actual tiger*

Tony: How'd you do?

MON: Hi ... (turning back to Randy) You own a talking tiger?

Lerner: Son when you're a billionaire you can own whatever you like.

MON: right, anyway what was this about Milner.

Lerner: These guys are offering me millions for what I can imagine are a few photoshoots in speedos and with feather boas and stuff.

*MON looks sceptical*

MON: Boss are you su....

Lerner: I mean 'Man United', you can bat for whatever side you want for the kind of money their offering.

MON: Sir, Man United is a football team not some publication for men of a certain persuasion.

Lerner: Nonsense Marty, it'll be the same as that deal with Barry for 'Man City'. You can't underestimate the power of the pink pound.

MON: Sir, Barry PLAYS for them now!

Lerner: He does? Gee I thought he had a homelife with kids and everything, go figure.

MON: No not for ... I give up.

*sources 'close to Villa' get on the internet and radio on MON's resignation*




Use your social login to comment on front page articles. Login using you Facebook, Twitter, Google or LinkedIn accounts and have your say!

Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

The Journalist

Writer: Hercs Mail feedback, articles or suggestions

Date:Wednesday March 31 2010

Time: 11:58AM

Your Comments

Most amusing
villan of the north
Most amusing
villan of the north
''Tony: How'd you do?'' - lmao!!!
Nel-A
LMAO, quality
DoLpHiNaToR
LMAO, quality
DoLpHiNaToR
"You can't underestimate the power of the pink pound"....classic!
CoxintheBox
"You can't underestimate the power of the pink pound"....classic!
CoxintheBox
Pink pound indeed. I'm not sure I'll ever think about "Man" Utd or "Man" City in quite the same way again -- it must be the football equivalent of imagining your boss without his trousers as he gives you a rollicking at work ... :o)
BobTheBuilder
 

Have Your Say

Log in...
with your social network     OR     with your Vital account

Recent Aston Villa Articles

Breaking News - Roy Keane Quits Villa (Friday November 28 2014)

Lambert's Confidence In Clark & Okore (Thursday November 27 2014)

Graham Does Head To Wolves (Thursday November 27 2014)

Lambert, Lambert, Give Us A Wave!? (Thursday November 27 2014)

U21s - Wolves 0-1 Villa (Wednesday November 26 2014)

Villa Fan - Rant Mode On... (Tuesday November 25 2014)

AVFC: Relegation Super Storm? (Tuesday November 25 2014)

Archived Aston Villa Articles

List All Vital Villa Articles
Have your say
Click here to suggest an article
Click here to suggest a poll

Vital Members League (view all)

1. Pride of Lions 937
2. ClivetheVillan 858
3. The Fear 713
4. kefkat 307
5. Freeman14 288
6. sirdennis 228
7. DeanoVilla 198
8. Villan57 167
9. Clubpaver 127
10. gator 121

League Results (view all)

League Table (view table)

Team P W D L GD Pts
13. WBA 12 3 4 5 -4 13
14. Sunderland 12 2 7 3 -7 13
15. Crystal Palace 12 3 3 6 -4 12
16. Aston Villa 12 3 3 6 -11 12
17. Hull City 12 2 5 5 -3 11
18. Leicester City 12 2 4 6 -7 10
19. Burnley 12 2 4 6 -12 10

Breaking League News

Ramires - An Ace Up Mourinho's Sleeve
Chelsea : 28/11/2014 12:12:00
West Bromwich Albion v Arsenal Match Preview
Arsenal : 28/11/2014 11:47:00
Liverpool: Toure Compares Rodgers To Wenger
Liverpool : 28/11/2014 10:41:00
Mystic Mug v Lawro - Villa Away To Burnley
Aston Villa : 28/11/2014 10:21:00
Garbutt impresses on European debut
Everton : 28/11/2014 10:15:00

Current Site Poll (view all polls)

Villa v Burnley (away) will:
Suggested By:  Mystic Mug
Win - phew! 36%
Lose - gulp! 47%
Draw - meh! 17%