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7-1 - The Real Explanation

7 - 1. The real explanation

Now there are several things you know will happen in life. Taxes. Lying, cheating, thieving politicians. Death. And the fact that when you break a tradition/superstition, something bad happens.

Monday to Friday I have a Weetabix covered with a sprinkling of Cornflakes. I don't buy a paper. Saturday and Sundays are different. I have hot Scotts Porridge Oats and buy the Daily Mail/ Mail on Sunday.

Saturday morning I opened the cupboard only to discover that there were none of the afore mentioned Porridge Oats.

No problem me thinks.

I will go and buy my paper and get some from my local store. So I stroll into my local shop, looking resplendent in old tracksuit bottoms, slippers, grubby shirt and sporting 'designer' stubble.

I bid Mustapha good day and ask where he stacks the porridge oats. Only to be met with a blank look. He actually looks that way most of the time, but on Saturday morning his brow furrowed a little deeper than normal. He showed me rabbit food, dog food, muesli and a fine selection of pre packed pitta breads. But no Porridge.

I knew then that the day could go two ways.

First it could go really well. We beat Chelsea 4 - 0 and I never eat porridge oats again.

Or the second thing could happen. And it did!!!

So the reason for Saturday was actually Mrs VOTH.

Had she have done her job and kept the cupboards full then the result would never have happened. I will be filing for divorce. Or was it me? Did I not motivate her. Should I have encouraged her where to go and what to buy? Should I have done the job myself?

Then I slapped myself and vowed never to doubt myself again. Of course it was her fault. Anybody know a good solicitor??

voiceoftheholte




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The Journalist

Writer: voiceoftheholte Mail feedback, articles or suggestions

Date:Monday March 29 2010

Time: 9:05AM

Your Comments (oldest first)

Change to most recent first
lol - let's hope there's a shortage of porridge oats ahead of our Wembley clash!
Merlin
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29/03/2010 09:09:00

lol - let's hope there's a shortage of porridge oats ahead of our Wembley clash!
Merlin
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29/03/2010 09:09:00

got woken up by my girlfriend Sunday morning. She said 'wake up J it is 8' I thought oh no, they've not scored again have they?
The Fear
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29/03/2010 09:10:00

the ability to have a laugh in the face of adversity should never be underestimated by us Villans! Lovely article lol
The Fear
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29/03/2010 09:10:00

got woken up by my girlfriend Sunday morning. She said 'wake up J it is 8' I thought oh no, they've not scored again have they?
The Fear
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29/03/2010 09:10:00

been told the semi final has been moved to Lords because their score board registers higher numbers! :o(
The Fear
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29/03/2010 09:11:00

been told the semi final has been moved to Lords because their score board registers higher numbers! :o(
The Fear
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29/03/2010 09:11:00

There was me thinking it was that black cat who committed suicide under the wheels of my car two weeks ago !
villan57
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29/03/2010 09:17:00

There was me thinking it was that black cat who committed suicide under the wheels of my car two weeks ago !
villan57
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29/03/2010 09:17:00

lol, good stuff guys - I blame breakfast cerial for lots of lifes mishaps!!!
davidsands1982
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29/03/2010 09:18:00

lol, good stuff guys - I blame breakfast cerial for lots of lifes mishaps!!!
davidsands1982
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29/03/2010 09:18:00

I spent saturday in the pub with 6 albion fans, where every goal was cheered louder than the last. I was pi$$ed by 3-1 so managed to laugh it off. It was only when i'd sobered up by Sunday that i realised the fiull extent. I think we defo missed Cuellar at right back tho ;-)
pauled177
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29/03/2010 09:19:00

Must admit I'm appalled Salifou hasn't been tried in goal. Come on, it is the most obvious solution as far as I can see.
The Fear
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29/03/2010 09:25:00

So the moral of the story is to make sure the Mrs VOTH gets her oats ?
mat777
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29/03/2010 09:40:00

I think we will go one of two ways from here on .. either we drop our heads and play like kittens or we will storm our way through to the end of the season smashing our way into Europe
Doug4ever
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29/03/2010 10:09:00

I think we will go one of two ways from here on .. either we drop our heads and play like kittens or we will storm our way through to the end of the season smashing our way into Europe
Doug4ever
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29/03/2010 10:09:00

At least were not West Ham
Doug4ever
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29/03/2010 10:29:00

Can honestly (oddly) say that 7-1 was better for you than 3-1. Sometimes theres nothing better than a big fat wake up call. Can honestly see you going unbeaten now till the end of the season. Whether its enough for 4th who knows but im sure your players wont want anything like that happening again.
HuddersfieldYiddo
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29/03/2010 10:59:00

Didn't MON train as a lawyer?Maybe he can help VOTH in more than one way.
Gordonsleftboot
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29/03/2010 11:29:00

Oh my good god it now all makes sense.. VOTH reads the friggin Daily/Sunday Mail!!! oh dear oh dear....
nottinghamvillain
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29/03/2010 11:32:00

I think we should ring Mr Lerner to let him know. That way Martin and the lads won't have to shoulder the blame. lol Great article.
villan of the north
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29/03/2010 12:47:00

nottinghamvillain lol. I know I know. My Labour supporting friends ridicule me for readng Britains biggest selling, quality Sunday paper and call me a Fascist. But hey ho, must be me and 3 million other fascists. What is the Country coming to?? Doesn't stop Pierced Organ (I mean Piers Morgan, one of Gordon Browns media luvvies), taking the Daily Mail shilling though. The depths to which some people stoop!!
voiceoftheholte
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29/03/2010 13:33:00

Bellamy, Bent, Van Bommel, Benayoun, DONE! I don't care what a fist Bellamy is...we need a aggressive guy up front instead of nice guys all the time, plus he crosses like a dream! Bent or Jones - rate them equally with Jones heading and youth being a plus but Bent is showing he can score again. Van Bommell is a quality no-nonsense midfielder who would add steel and be a real man....he and Petrov could rotate...Add to that a surprise signing like Huntelaar or Tosic from Bayern then we are back on track but we need to really think about who we can attract and why we are buying them....not just for the positions they play but the signals that buying them sounds out.Bellamy, Bent, Van Bommel, Benayoun, DONE! I don't care what a fist Bellamy is...we need a aggressive guy up front instead of nice guys all the time, plus he crosses like a dream! Bent or Jones - rate them equally with Jones heading and youth being a plus but Bent is showing he can score again. Van Bommell is a quality no-nonsense midfielder who would add steel and be a real man....he and Petrov could rotate...Add to that a surprise signing like Huntelaar or Tosic from Bayern then we are back on track but we need to really think about who we can attract and why we are buying them....not just for the positions they play but the signals that buying them sounds out.
koolbill
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29/03/2010 13:41:00

Balls, I pasted it twice. sorry, better than a 7 times pasting though!
koolbill
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29/03/2010 13:43:00

Balls, I pasted it twice. sorry, better than a 7 times pasting though!
koolbill
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29/03/2010 13:43:00

Sorry, meant Olic from Bayern.
koolbill
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29/03/2010 13:55:00

Huddersfield Yiddo's got a point. A 3 1 defeat - maybe even a 5 1 defeat - and MON would probably say "Chelsea are one of the best teams in Eurpoe....yawn, yawn...............". 7 1 and you have to ask massive questions about your team, not put it down to the superiority of the opposition.
JimmyG
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29/03/2010 15:57:00

to be honest though, if we did get fourth, will it really be that great? its just extra games on an already stretched squad. you've seen whats happened when we were knocked out of the Europa League early on, so not finishing fourth may be a blessing
jimjim96
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29/03/2010 19:25:00

to be honest though, if we did get fourth, will it really be that great? its just extra games on an already stretched squad. you've seen whats happened when we were knocked out of the Europa League early on, so not finishing fourth may be a blessing
jimjim96
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29/03/2010 19:25:00

Jimmy G - Do you not think the result was partly down to the fact that we made changes to try and get back in the game? We took off pretty much all our midfield and put on offensive players which was always going to be a risk. I watched the game (not just the highlights) and the first half we were unlucky to go in 2-1 down following a silly challenge. The third goal was a sucker punch and from then on it was win or bust and we went bust.
Longman
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29/03/2010 20:30:00

Longman, i totally agree. They were my thoughts too on reflection. MON made changes to take the game to Chelsea, but their midfield sliced through ours like a hot knife through butter after those changes!
Charizma
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29/03/2010 20:43:00

Longman, i totally agree. They were my thoughts too on reflection. MON made changes to take the game to Chelsea, but their midfield sliced through ours like a hot knife through butter after those changes!
Charizma
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29/03/2010 20:43:00

I think I should take A share of the blame (or a least the wife) - i have a black away top (from 98?, NTL were the sponsors) that i always wear for tricky away games. Well it was soaking wet in the laundry and could not be worn until the second half. stupid stupid stupid
lost_in_ca
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30/03/2010 06:45:00

I think I should take A share of the blame (or a least the wife) - i have a black away top (from 98?, NTL were the sponsors) that i always wear for tricky away games. Well it was soaking wet in the laundry and could not be worn until the second half. stupid stupid stupid
lost_in_ca
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30/03/2010 06:45:00

I think he has a valid point,life is said to be all mind control by quite a few people.
ASPINALL
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30/03/2010 07:07:00

I think he has a valid point,life is said to be all mind control by quite a few people.
ASPINALL
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30/03/2010 07:07:00

Great article, helps to lift the depression.. I think we will see a reaction to that result.. and it could work out to be better than a 1-0 loss.. Mons teamtalk for the semi should be easy after saturday..
hazza01
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30/03/2010 09:07:00

Great article, helps to lift the depression.. I think we will see a reaction to that result.. and it could work out to be better than a 1-0 loss.. Mons teamtalk for the semi should be easy after saturday..
hazza01
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30/03/2010 09:07:00

 

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