UK time is: 14:01:02
Vital Login
Social Login

Choose your club

Other Sites

Network Navigation

Vital Partners

'If It's Football, It's Vital'

Hercs In The Dressing Room After the Stoke Match

*We join the lads mulling over their 0-0 draw against Stoke, MON is celebrating like he's won the world cup*

MON: Yippee!!

*Milner whispers to Ashley Young*

Milner: Why's the boss celebrating like that man?

A.Young: Because it's the middle of March and we've not lost yet.

*MON immediately stops celebrating and his face contorts with rage*

MON: Who said it!? Who said the name of the month I said was never to be said in the dressing room!?

*The lads all sheepishly point at Heskey*

Heskey: What!? I didn't ... I mean.... It wasn't.

MON: Emile! A man of your age and discernable lack of striking ability should know better.

Heskey: Don't put me on the chair boss, please, I didn't even say 'March'.

MON: That's it! 'Funny man' are you!? Do I need to remind you what happened to Nigel!?

.....

*Nigel Reo-Coker is handcuffed to a radiator in a dank room somewhere in bodymoor heath, there appears to be nothing in the room but a saw, tears are streaming down his face*

NRC: I only suggested that we play a right back at right back.

....

Heskey: Sorry boss.

MON: As this is a day for celebration I'll show mercy Emile but know this....

*MON points to his eyes with two fingers then at Heskey with them*

MON: Anyway, OK game lads, we couldn't possibly be expected to win with that wind.

Gabby: Sorry boss, don't think my stomach's right yet.

MON: No, I mean, nevermind. John where were the goals?

*Carew doesn't look up from filing his nails*

Carew: Nah, not today.

MON: I ... um .... OK.




Use your social login to comment on front page articles. Login using you Facebook, Twitter, Google or LinkedIn accounts and have your say!



Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

The Journalist

Writer: Hercs Mail feedback, articles or suggestions

Date:Monday March 15 2010

Time: 10:45AM

Your Comments

on form as usual!
The Fear
on form as usual!
The Fear
ha ha ha
vangogo
ha ha ha
vangogo
brilliant...
duggan8
brilliant...
duggan8
Carew, nah not today!! how true is that? great stuff.
claretandbluearmy
LOL I loved the saw reference! had me lmao!
Astriel
LOL I loved the saw reference! had me lmao!
Astriel
Good one Hercs. Good to get a laugh out of what was a relatively poor performance. You sure you haven't got an 'insider' in the dressing room, and your spoof post game talk actually took place? Keep 'em coming.
glensider
Good one Hercs. Good to get a laugh out of what was a relatively poor performance. You sure you haven't got an 'insider' in the dressing room, and your spoof post game talk actually took place? Keep 'em coming.
glensider
 

Have Your Say

Log in...
with your social network     OR     with your Vital account

Recent Aston Villa Articles

Lawro v Mystic Mug - Villa v Spurs (Saturday November 1 2014)

Something For The Weekend (470) (Friday October 31 2014)

Tonev Gets Seven Match Ban (Friday October 31 2014)

Steer Returns & Disappears To Yeovil (Friday October 31 2014)

The Villa Times - 31/10/2014 (Friday October 31 2014)

Lambert Out? Or Go Again? (Wednesday October 29 2014)

U21s Gain Wolves Victory (Wednesday October 29 2014)

Archived Aston Villa Articles

List All Vital Villa Articles
Have your say
Click here to suggest an article
Click here to suggest a poll

Vital Members League (view all)

League Results (view all)

League Table (view table)

Team P W D L GD Pts
12. Stoke 9 3 2 4 -2 11
13. WBA 9 2 4 3 -1 10
14. Newcastle 9 2 4 3 -5 10
15. Aston Villa 9 3 1 5 -10 10
16. Crystal Palace 9 2 3 4 -3 9
17. Leicester City 9 2 3 4 -4 9
18. Sunderland 9 1 5 3 -9 8

Breaking League News

Line Ups & Updates: Everton vs Swansea City
Swansea : 01/11/2014 13:36:00
Aston Villa vs Tottenham Hotspur.
Spurs : 01/11/2014 12:53:00
Liverpool: Newcastle vs. LFC Team News
Liverpool : 01/11/2014 11:49:00
Match Day Moments - QPR (h)
Chelsea : 01/11/2014 09:24:00
Lawro v Mystic Mug - Villa v Spurs
Aston Villa : 01/11/2014 08:44:00

Current Site Poll (view all polls)

Villa v Spurs (home) will:
Suggested By:  Mystic Mug
Win 6%
Lose 86%
Draw 8%