Hercs In The Dressing Room Post Reading Cup Match
*We join the lads rejoicing after their 4-2 victory over Reading. Most of them are cleaning tea off the walls and sweeping up broken china from half-time.*
MON: See lads, that wasn't so hard was it?
*MON packs away his blow torch, Gabby emerges from the toilets*
Gabby: Is it over? How'd you guys get on?
A.Young: We won Gabby, but why didn't you play?
Gabby: I'm no good at reading.
A.Young: Reading? What's that got to do with ...... Oh, we weren't 'reading'... like books Gab.
Carew: I was reading the defenders like books.
*The dressing room erupts with laughter*
MON (wiping a tear away): Oh John when you're not totally disrespecting the team and everything it stands for with lacklustre, disinterested performances you're amazing.
Carew: Well, you know me.
*Carew shrugs his shoulders with an amusing frown, everyone hugs him whilst laughing*
All the lads: We love you John.
Carew: Yeah, yeah I know.
Heskey: What about me? I had a hand in every goal and won us possession about 90% of the time out there.
*Heskey grins widely whilst holding his arms out for a 'team hug'*
MON: Sssssh Emile, look John's flexing his biceps.
Carew: Oh Yeah! Check out the gun show!
*The lads ignore Heskey and are applauding and whooping the 'show'*
Heskey: I mean I know I didn't score but I....
MON: Emile! Now that's enough out of you! Sit on the 'No Goal' chair!
*Heskey saunters over to a chair facing the wall which crudely has 'No Goals' written on the back, He slumps into it, folds his arms and kicks the wall*
Heskey: Stupid Carew and his stupid goals I should...
MON: What are you mumbling over there Emile!?
Heskey: Nothing boss!