Vital Football

Latest Aston Villa News

Hercs In The Dressing Room Pre Carling Cup Final

Hercs In The Dressing Room Pre Carling Cup Final

*We join MON and the lads preparing for a historic Carling Cup final at Wembley*

MON: Settle down lads settle down, now all week people have said 'Martin who's in the team?', 'Mr.O'Neil what's your pick for the final?' and I have kept it secret, it's just the way I operate.

*The lads all lean in with great interest.*

MON: And it will remain a secret! I'll take it to my grave! You'll have to pry the team sheet from my cold dead hands I tell you! Cold dead hands!

Dunne: Will ya not have to let us, tha team, know who's playing bass?

MON: Hmmm .... Fair point.

*Sidwell raises his hand excitedly*

Sidwell: Oooh, ooh boss am I playing!? Am I?

*The dressing room erupts with laughter*

Sidwell: What? I can play football!

*The dressing room erupts with laughter again, MON lifts his glasses dabbing the tears in his eyes with a handkerchief*

MON: Oh Steve, you're a gem. Now the goalkeeping dilemma has also been on the tips of everyone's tounges 'which Brad will he choose?' you cry. Well the 'keeper I've chosen has proven himself a protector beyond reproach and a man willing to throw his body wherever it takes. Brad, come on in!

*Friedel and Guzan look at each other puzzled, as the door opens and 'Brad' is forced through them followed by John Robertson.*

MON: Congratulate Bradley everyone!

*The lads stare, mostly in silence, Gabby is applauding, it's Bradley, from Eastenders*

MON: Brad everyone!

*Friedel has buried his face into his gloves, Guzan is scratching his head, Gabby is prodding Bradley's face with his finger*

Gabby: I thought you were dead?

MON: Now Brad would you care to put on your gloves.

Bradley: Thanks for the opportunity and all but I'm not a footballer.

MON: Nonsense, I know alot of 'keepers feel that way but you're every bit as an integral part of the team as a defender or striker Brad my boy.

Bradley: No .... I mean .... and my name's not actually Bradley it's .....

MON: Nevermind nicknames lad, just get your gloves on, we have our final match to play.

Gabby: Final match!? Are United going to .... Kill us?

MON: I'll kill you if we don't win!

*The lads all look at MON with unease, MON smiles*

MON: Only kidding lads.

*The lads look relieved, some of them chuckle*

MON: John will. Show 'em what you're working with Robbo.

*a sneering John Robertson unzips his large coat, opening it to reveal an array of deadly weapons.*

MON: Now get out there! It's death or glory! Play like your lives are on the line. Because they are!



Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

Writer:Hercs
Date:Friday February 26 2010
Time: 10:43AM

Comments

0
The best one yet herks! good one for the final
overlooked_villan
26/02/2010 11:05:00
0
LOL, so true about Sidwell, can actually believe that happening to a degree :-) ~ thanks once again Hercs
davidsands1982
26/02/2010 11:19:00
0
LOL, so true about Sidwell, can actually believe that happening to a degree :-) ~ thanks once again Hercs
davidsands1982
26/02/2010 11:19:00
0
looking forward to the post match CELEBRATION one...!
The Fear
26/02/2010 11:24:00
0
I've got a feeling that the post match 'Hercs' won't appear if we lose. Humour will be difficult to find in such circumstances. But that won't be an issue because we will win. Thanks again Hercs.
andy5759
26/02/2010 17:37:00
0
I've got a feeling that the post match 'Hercs' won't appear if we lose. Humour will be difficult to find in such circumstances. But that won't be an issue because we will win. Thanks again Hercs.
andy5759
26/02/2010 17:37:00
Page 1/1
  1. 1

Login to post a comment

Recent Aston Villa Articles

Villa's International Injury Update

Another tired and boring international break in the world of football, so here's an update from Bodymoor Heath on our walking wounded.

The Villa Times - 24/03/2017 (Aston Villa News Round-up)

The latest Aston Villa news and views via the uno fish ial one...

Videos. Inside The Aston Villa Dressing Room

Hate international breaks, so hey, thought some of you might have missed these. Quite good fun some of them.

Villa Replicate Reading Offer

With Reading charging our fans (season ticket holders or members) only £20 for our trip to the Madejski Stadium earlier in the season, Villa have reciprocated the deal...

Archived Vital Villa Articles

Vital Villa articles from

Site Journalists

J P Fear
Editor email
Profile
Mike Field
Editor email
Profile
Steve Wade
no email
Profile
Villa_Grizzly
no email
Profile
Turkish Penguin
no email
Profile
Glensider
no email
Profile
Chris Heath
no email
Profile
M Calucar
no email
Profile
JuanPablo Angel
no email
Profile

Current Poll (see more polls)

I have nothing to ask! I hate international breaks!
Suggested By: ;o)
Agree85%
Disagree8%
Whatever 7%
ScoopDragon Publishing Entire League Network of Sites

League Table

# Team P W D L Pts. GD
1 Newcastle 38 24 6 8 78 38
2 Brighton 38 23 8 7 77 30
3 Huddersfield 37 22 5 10 71 4
4 Leeds Utd 38 21 6 11 69 16
5 Reading 38 20 7 11 67 2
6 Sheff Wed 38 18 8 12 62 9
7 Fulham 38 16 13 9 61 19
8 Norwich 38 16 9 13 57 9
9 Preston 38 15 12 11 57 6
10 Derby County 38 14 11 13 53 3
11 Barnsley 38 14 9 15 51 0
12 Aston Villa 38 13 12 13 51 0
13 Cardiff 38 14 9 15 51 -1
14 Brentford 38 14 8 16 50 3
15 Q.P.R. 38 14 8 16 50 -5
16 Wolves 37 12 9 16 45 -2
17 Ipswich 38 10 15 13 45 -9
18 Birmingham 38 11 12 15 45 -16
19 Bristol City 38 11 8 19 41 -3
20 Forest 38 11 8 19 41 -11
21 Burton 38 10 11 17 41 -14
22 Blackburn 38 9 13 16 40 -11
23 Wigan 38 8 10 20 34 -13
24 Rotherham 38 4 5 29 17 -54
Vital Football Comment
Latest F1 News
More calls to ban the shark fins
Latest Vital Boxing News
Taylor v Joubert – Meadowbank, Scotland
Write for Vital Football

Recent Aston Villa Results (view all)

Aston Villa Fixtures (view all)

Apr 1 2017 3:00PM : Norwich City (H)
Sky Bet Championship
Apr 4 2017 7:45PM : Queens Park Rangers (H)
Sky Bet Championship
Apr 8 2017 3:00PM : Burton Albion (a)
Sky Bet Championship
Apr 15 2017 3:00PM : Reading (H)
Sky Bet Championship
Apr 17 2017 2:45PM : Fulham (a)
Sky Bet Championship
Apr 23 2017 12:00PM : Birmingham City (H)
Sky Bet Championship

Vital Members League Table

RankNamePoints
1.The Fear360
2.Pride of Lions282
3.sirdennis279
4.JuanPabloAngel239
5.HeathfieldRoad1874217
6.Sasquatch161
7.Silhillvilla156
8.Melon Donkey143
9.BodyButter132
10.DeanoVilla127
The Vital Football Members League