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Hercs In The Dressing Room Pre-Burnley Match

*We join the lads getting ready for their match against Burnley*

MON: OK lads we've been here before, Burnley are a.....

*A loud roar is heard outside the dressing room*

MON: What in the world?

*The door crashes open and Brian Jensen storms in, he is snarling, kicking chairs about and knocking over flipcharts, Sidwell is holding up a chair with the legs pointed at 'the beast'*

Sidwell: What the hell is that thing!?

Delph: I dunno, but if I can kick it, I can kill it.

*Delph lurches forward with a grin on his face*

MON: No Fabian! Get back here.

*Delph frowns, Brian Laws appears in the doorway*

Laws: Brian! Brian!

*Laws grabs the large chain around Jensen's neck and tugs him toward the door.*

Laws: Sorry fellas, he gets a bit 'flappy' when we're away from home.

MON: Get it out of my dressing room!

*Laws and Jensen leave*

MON: Right with the fixtures piling up I'm going to have to rotate the squad.

*MON points to his squad and formation on a whiteboard, Ashley Young raises his hand*

MON: Ashley?

A.Young: Boss that's the same squad we always play.

MON: Oh but is it Ashley? As you can see I have swapped James and Stilyan in the middle, James will play in the left central position, Stilyan in the right.

Milner: That's what we already pleey like.

MON: Oh.

*MON turns to the whiteboard rubbing out Milner and Petrov's names and swapping them around*

MON: There, and just to shake things up around the 70 or 80 minute mark I'll bring on Steve or Fabian, they'll never see it coming.

*Delph mutters aloud as he jots on a notepad.*

Delph: (70th minute ..... Kick Eagles) Gotcha boss.

MON: Hang on, no kicking.

Delph: (...and Elliot)

MON: Wait what are you writing there?

*Delph clutches his notepad to his chest*

Delph: Nowt boss.

*MON returns to his team talk*

Delph: (...Especially Eagles)




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The Journalist

Writer: Hercs Mail feedback, articles or suggestions

Date:Friday February 19 2010

Time: 4:18PM

Your Comments

figured it out then Hercs... nice one!
The Fear
figured it out then Hercs... nice one!
The Fear
Lmao Hercs! The pre Burnley one was my favourite last time round with the portaloo for an away dressing room at Turf Moor and you've done it again. F'in brilliant!
JayVFC
Lmao Hercs! The pre Burnley one was my favourite last time round with the portaloo for an away dressing room at Turf Moor and you've done it again. F'in brilliant!
JayVFC
well done...
vangogo
well done...
vangogo
"But if I can kick it, I can kill it".
benji_starsky_avfc
"But if I can kick it, I can kill it".
benji_starsky_avfc
Brilliant once more Hercs. We must work together sometime!
murph
Brilliant once more Hercs. We must work together sometime!
murph
That's brightened up my weekend, pure class!
leerj0
That's brightened up my weekend, pure class!
leerj0
Fan- bloody- tastic!! I'd love to get a look at Delph's notebook/hitlist...
NorthcliffeBandit
Fan- bloody- tastic!! I'd love to get a look at Delph's notebook/hitlist...
NorthcliffeBandit
Funny stuff, again!
ant1ant1
Funny stuff, again!
ant1ant1
I love'd the, "Oh but is it Ashley?"...
FootyFans
I love'd the, "Oh but is it Ashley?"...
FootyFans
 

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