Vital Football

Latest Aston Villa News

Hercs 'In The Dressing Room' Post Spurs

Hercs 'In The Dressing Room' Post Spurs

*We join the lads reflecting on their 0-0 draw against Spurs, MON is nowhere to be seen*

A.Young: Has anyone seen the boss?

Milner: Last I saw, Harry was trying to sell him a truckload of video players like.

Delph: You mean DVD players.

Milner: Noor.

A.Young: Well, we better look for him.

*The players split up in search of MON at White Hart Lane, Eventually they happen on him, asleep in the dugout*

A.Young: Boss?

MON: ... And make sure he's british ......

A.Young: Boss!?

MON: .....With none of that 'fancy Dan' stuff ......

A.Young: BOSS!?!?

*MON Snores loudly then jumps with a start*

MON: GET AT THEM! PUSH UP! MAN ON!

A.Young: Boss .... The match is over.

*MON raises his glasses, rubs his eyes and removes his claret and blue striped sleeping cap*

MON: Oh right .... Nil nil was it?

A.Young: Yeah.

*Everyone returns to the Dressing Room*

MON (yawning and stretching): Well another outstanding show of defence, you should be proud of yourselves lads we defended the hell out of Spurs out there. Richard.

Dunne: Yes dere bass?

MON: Richard, Richard, Richard.

Dunne: Yes? .... Bass?

MON: When I put your name on the team sheet I know no goals will be scored..... Much like you Emile.

*The dressing room erupts with laughter*

Heskey: It's not my fault boss, I got injured, I planned to score at least three goals.

*The dressing room erupts with laughter again*

Heskey: What's funny? I can score goals!

*The dressing room erupts with laughter once more*

Heskey: Besides I help out at the back and like they say the best form of Offence is a good defence boss.

MON: Who? Who says that Emile? They're wrong! The best form of offence is offence that's why they called it 'offence'

*Sidwell and Delph are whispering at the back of the dressing room*

Delph: I'm so fed up, I didn't get to kick anyone ... Anyone! I mean I tried to kick John Robertson and he kept dodging me, he's like an old ninja.

Sidwell: I know, why'd he start with Stilyan? I mean I heard he was injured.

Delph: I heard he's dead .... and the boss still plays him.

*Sidwell and Delph look over at Petrov who is unblinking and rigidly in a standing position but leaned resting on a chair*

MON: What're you two talking about back there!?

Delph & Sidwell: Nothing boss.

MON: Stilyan, what were they talking about?

*Everyone turns to Petrov, he doesn't move and remains silent*

MON: Is that right Stilyan? OK then.

*The lads all look at each other, Petrov's hand falls off*

MON: Fabian, go and get the physio, tell him to bring the tape.



Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

Writer:Hercs
Date:Monday February 8 2010
Time: 8:18PM

Best of Vital Network

Comments

0
MON: When I put your name on the team sheet I know no goals will be scored..... Much like you Emile. Brilliant.
claretandbluearmy
08/02/2010 22:30:00
0
MON: When I put your name on the team sheet I know no goals will be scored..... Much like you Emile. Brilliant.
claretandbluearmy
08/02/2010 22:30:00
0
absolutely brilliant....keep them coming
Bangkok Villan
09/02/2010 01:26:00
0
absolutely brilliant....keep them coming
Bangkok Villan
09/02/2010 01:26:00
0
left me laughing outloud at work again like a fool, so thanks for that Hercs!

Sometimes (only very briefly mind you) I do feel a little sorry for Emile.
davidsands1982
09/02/2010 10:59:00
0
left me laughing outloud at work again like a fool, so thanks for that Hercs!

Sometimes (only very briefly mind you) I do feel a little sorry for Emile.
davidsands1982
09/02/2010 10:59:00
Page 1/1
  1. 1

Login to post a comment

Recent Aston Villa Articles

Something For The Weekend (542)

Progressing a point at a time and a new player at a time..

Aston Villa Defender Cardiff City Bound...

Joe Bennett on his way to that there Wales.

Chris Samuelson A Goner. Or A Never Was?!??!

A little bit of confusion over the role that Chris Samuelson did or didn`t play at Aston Villa and/or Recon Group.

Match Day Officials v Bristol City (27/8/16)

The Football League have now announced the Match Day officials that will take charge of the game against Bristol City this Saturday.

Archived Vital Villa Articles

Vital Villa articles from

Site Journalists

J P Fear
Editor email
Profile
Mike Field
Editor email
Profile
Steve Wade
no email
Profile
Villa_Grizzly
no email
Profile
Turkish Penguin
no email
Profile
Glensider
no email
Profile
Chris Heath
no email
Profile
M Calucar
no email
Profile
JuanPablo Angel
no email
Profile

Current Poll (see more polls)

Aston Villa v Bristol City (away) will:
Suggested By: Mystic Mug
Win71%
Lose8%
Draw21%
ScoopDragon Publishing Entire League Network of Sites

League Table

# Team P W D L Pts. GD
1 Huddersfield 4 3 1 0 10 3
2 Brighton 4 2 2 0 8 6
3 Wolves 4 2 2 0 8 4
4 Norwich 4 2 2 0 8 4
5 Fulham 4 2 2 0 8 2
6 Q.P.R. 4 2 0 2 6 2
7 Newcastle 4 2 0 2 6 2
8 Brentford 4 2 0 2 6 1
9 Barnsley 4 2 0 2 6 0
10 Bristol City 4 2 0 2 6 0
11 Forest 4 2 0 2 6 -2
12 Aston Villa 4 1 2 1 5 2
13 Ipswich 4 1 2 1 5 0
14 Birmingham 4 1 2 1 5 -1
15 Cardiff 4 1 2 1 5 -1
16 Derby County 4 1 2 1 5 -1
17 Wigan 4 1 1 2 4 1
18 Burton 4 1 1 2 4 0
19 Leeds Utd 4 1 1 2 4 -2
20 Sheff Wed 4 1 1 2 4 -3
21 Reading 4 1 1 2 4 -4
22 Rotherham 4 1 1 2 4 -5
23 Preston 4 1 0 3 3 -1
24 Blackburn 4 0 1 3 1 -7
Write for Vital Football
Latest F1 News
2016 Belgian Grand Prix - FP2
Latest Vital Boxing News
Buatsi Homes in On Olympic Gold
The Vital Football Members League

Recent Aston Villa Results (view all)

Aston Villa Fixtures (view all)

Vital Members League Table

RankNamePoints
1.The Fear626
2.glensider603
3.Fulford386
4.Silhillvilla226
5.sirdennis199
6.kefkat170
7.DeanoVilla164
8.Barney2004156
9.Melon Donkey154
10.villasince67154
Vital Football Comment