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Hercs 'In The Dressing Room ' Pre Fulham

Hercs 'In The Dressing Room ' Pre Fulham

*We join the lads in preperation for their match against Fulham*

MON: OK lads due to the recent league goal drought I've bought in a man who knows where the back of the net is, lads please welcome Dwight Yorke!

*Dwight Yorke strolls casually into the dressing room to generous applause*

Yorke: Thankyou, thankyou.

*Gabby raises his hand*

Yorke: Gabriel?

Gabby: Give us back our net!

Yorke: What?

Gabby: Our net! You know where it is!

*The lads are holding Gabby back*

MON: Gabriel, Gabriel it's just an expression meaning he's a prolific striker.

*Gabby sits down still staring accusingly at Yorke*

Yorke: O.....K, anyway Emile, I'll start with you.

*Heskey smiles a proud grin*

Yorke: Back in Trinidad and Tobago we have a word for the type of striker you are .... rubbish.

MON: So Dwight, any advice?

Yorke: Certainly, I would suggest that perhaps when you get a chance, you shoot .... You might score.

*Heskey scribbles attentively on his notepad*

Heskey: Shoot..... Might ...... Score.

Yorke: And you Gabriel, you have it all, pace, power you just need to work on your decision making.

*Gabby leans in with interest*

Yorke: I mean what're you doing getting these munters pregnant? Look at me, I bagged Jordan, raise the bar man!

*Gabby nods*

Yorke: You Big John, you're spending too long out there trying to look good.

*Yorke pulls a folded photo out of his pocket*

Yorke: Look at this, do I look like I'm concerned with looking good?

*It's a picture of Yorke smiling at the camera, he's wearing the hideous '94 green, red and black Muller away shirt*

Carew: No.

Yorke: No I don't, because I'm more concerned with beating the man and scoring goals.

Harewood: What about me Dwight!? How can I improve?

Yorke: You? You should not play football.

Harewood: Why because of my broken foot?

Yorke: No.

MON: Right thanks for that Dwight, lads go out out there and for the love of God one of you score!



Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

Writer:Hercs
Date:Friday January 29 2010
Time: 2:58PM

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Comments

0
i only just discouvered these today and read them all.... very funny!
avmalada
29/01/2010 16:02:00
0
i only just discouvered these today and read them all.... very funny!
avmalada
29/01/2010 16:02:00
0
oi - i still wear my "*hideous '94 green, red and black Muller away shirt*" wore it Milan in fact .... http://s285.photobucket.com/albums/ll75/lostinca/?action=view&current=Milan.jpg
lost_in_ca
29/01/2010 17:46:00
0
oi - i still wear my "*hideous '94 green, red and black Muller away shirt*" wore it Milan in fact .... http://s285.photobucket.com/albums/ll75/lostinca/?action=view&current=Milan.jpg
lost_in_ca
29/01/2010 17:46:00
0
And you look very nice in it as well
Doug4ever
29/01/2010 23:42:00
0
And you look very nice in it as well
Doug4ever
29/01/2010 23:42:00
0
I'm not a villa fan, but I'm loving these! Sooo funny!
tuscan3000
30/01/2010 04:20:00
0
I'm not a villa fan, but I'm loving these! Sooo funny!
tuscan3000
30/01/2010 04:20:00
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