Vital Football

Latest Aston Villa News

Hercs In The Dressing Room (Spoof)

Hercs In The Dressing Room (Spoof)

*We join the lads pleased with the draw against West Ham. MON enters*

MON: Defenders well done, nice clean sheet. Midfielders, good battling, some good creative work out there.

*MON starts heading toward his office*

Gabby: And the strikers?

*MON turns back to the players, looking over his glasses*

MON: Strikers? Oh I'm sorry Gabriel I didn't realise there were any strikers playing!

Gabby: Boss ... Are you ... angry? Because on the interview you said ...

MON: Yes I'm angry, West Ham fielded a 10 year old who looked more of a threat than you three stooges!

Gabby: He's 18 boss.

MON: Oh so now you choose to be accurate Gabriel!?

Heskey: Boss calm down the vein on your head is ....

MON: Why don't you shoot Emile?

Heskey: What? Now?

MON: Now?! You don't even have a ball! I mean on the pitch, you're a forward for God's sake act like one.

Heskey: But .... But I bring something different to the table.

MON: 'But I bring something different to the table' wah, wah, wah.

*MON feigns rubbing his eyes*

Heskey: You monster!

*Heskey flees from the dressing room hiding his tears with his forearm*

MON: And you, you don't care do you!?

*MON points at Carew who is filing his nails singing 'John Carew, Carew' quietly to himself*

MON: I know you can hear me John!

Carew: he's gonna score one or two....

MON: John!?

Carew: John Carew, Carew.

MON: Great! You know what this means don't you? Every Tom, Dick and Harry whining that we need a 20 goal a season super-hero with bionic legs and a telescopic head.

A.Young: Like Inspector Gadget boss?

MON: Yes, like Inspector bloody Gadget! Or some foreign striker they bought on their 'play box station' computer game thing!

*Gabby raises his hand*

Gabbys: Boss they're called .....

*MON removes his glasses, Gabby lowers his hand*



Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

Writer:Hercs
Date:Monday January 18 2010
Time: 1:04PM

Comments

0
why don't you shoot emile 'what now?' LOL
The Fear
18/01/2010 13:06:00
0
why don't you shoot emile 'what now?' LOL
The Fear
18/01/2010 13:06:00
0
I need a subscription to you hercs... this is some really good stuff
vangogo
18/01/2010 13:16:00
0
I need a subscription to you hercs... this is some really good stuff
vangogo
18/01/2010 13:16:00
0
hercs, youre about as funny as herpes
Adbo9
18/01/2010 13:22:00
0
hercs, youre about as funny as herpes
Adbo9
18/01/2010 13:22:00
0
Ha I actually bet this really happened too! Apart from MON also called them a bunch of Tw4ts not just the fans he had a ruck with ha!
leelindsay
18/01/2010 13:25:00
0
Ha I actually bet this really happened too! Apart from MON also called them a bunch of Tw4ts not just the fans he had a ruck with ha!
leelindsay
18/01/2010 13:25:00
0
Cheers Adbo9, the plaudits just keep coming in.
Hercs
18/01/2010 14:11:00
0
Cheers Adbo9, the plaudits just keep coming in.
Hercs
18/01/2010 14:11:00
Page 1/3
  1. 1
  2. 2
  3. 3

Login to post a comment

Recent Aston Villa Articles

Gana Release Clause Angers Xia. RDM Wouldn't Have Let Go

Looks like the Villa owner and manager aren't happy that Gana has a release clause and is leaving.

Something For The Weekend (538)

....I do think that when players collectively allow their professional standards to fall to unacceptable levels, that maybe, a little explanation is due.

Behaviour Rules - Some Initial Reaction

Various rules on what is and isn't acceptable are being rolled out this season in an attempt to reduce 'intolerable behaviour' towards match day officials. What's the initial reaction?

One Of The Villa Failures Departs - Guzan to Boro

Aston Villa have confirmed that goalkeeper Brad Guzan has completed his move to Middlesbrough.

Archived Vital Villa Articles

Vital Villa articles from

Site Journalists

J P Fear
Editor email
Profile
Mike Field
Editor email
Profile
Steve Wade
no email
Profile
Villa_Grizzly
no email
Profile
Turkish Penguin
no email
Profile
Glensider
no email
Profile
Chris Heath
no email
Profile
M Calucar
no email
Profile
JuanPablo Angel
no email
Profile

Current Poll (see more polls)

Would you keep Scott Sinclair?
Suggested By: JP Fear
Yes, could be an asset66%
No32%
Unsure2%
ScoopDragon Publishing Entire League Network of Sites

League Table

# Team P W D L Pts. GD
1 Aston Villa 0 0 0 0 0 0
2 Barnsley 0 0 0 0 0 0
3 Birmingham 0 0 0 0 0 0
4 Blackburn 0 0 0 0 0 0
5 Brentford 0 0 0 0 0 0
6 Brighton 0 0 0 0 0 0
7 Bristol City 0 0 0 0 0 0
8 Burton 0 0 0 0 0 0
9 Cardiff 0 0 0 0 0 0
10 Derby County 0 0 0 0 0 0
11 Fulham 0 0 0 0 0 0
12 Huddersfield 0 0 0 0 0 0
13 Ipswich 0 0 0 0 0 0
14 Leeds Utd 0 0 0 0 0 0
15 Newcastle 0 0 0 0 0 0
16 Norwich 0 0 0 0 0 0
17 Forest 0 0 0 0 0 0
18 Preston 0 0 0 0 0 0
19 Q.P.R. 0 0 0 0 0 0
20 Reading 0 0 0 0 0 0
21 Rotherham 0 0 0 0 0 0
22 Sheff Wed 0 0 0 0 0 0
23 Wigan 0 0 0 0 0 0
24 Wolves 0 0 0 0 0 0
The Vital Football Members League
Latest F1 News
Blog: Hockenheim Qualifying
Latest Vital Boxing News
Frampton’s Banking on his Power!
Vital Football Comment

Recent Aston Villa Results (view all)

Aston Villa Fixtures (view all)

Vital Members League Table

RankNamePoints
1.The Fear557
2.Fulford235
3.sirdennis235
4.glensider210
5.Silhillvilla178
6.kefkat147
7.gator131
8.McParlandTheGreat116
9.1958Villan102
10.HeathfieldRoad187489
Write for Vital Football