Date:Monday January 4 2010
*We join the lads gearing up for the first leg of their semi-final against Blackburn*
MON: I've got some sad news lads.
*The lads brace themselves for bad news*
MON: It's going to be tricky trying to keep Craig at the club....
*Craig Gardner is gripping both sides of the doorframe, MON is barging him in the back with his shoulder*
MON: See the thing is, he wants first team football and the offer from the Blue side of the City is too good to pass for him.
*MON is continually attempting to ram Gardner out of the door, he is barely budging*
Gardner: No! I didn't say that! Let me stay, I don't want first team football, I'll do anything!
MON: It's not that I want the £3.5 million lads, we just don't want to hold back Craig's career.
*MON is biting Gardner's hand, whilst still trying to force him out the door*
Gardner: Look I've got plans I could be another lion mascot, like a Scrappy-doo type one, the kids 'll love it and I can .....
MON: No, no Craig we wouldn't want to keep you here another season against your will.
*Alex McCleish arrives with a large novelty cheque and a cat carrier*
Garder: No! Nooooo!
*MON and McCleish stuff Gardner into the cat carrier, he's still scratching at the door*
McCleish: Och! He's a feisty 'un he'll fit righ' in.
*MON yanks the cheque and slams the door in McCleish's face*
MON: No refunds! Anyway lads, I'll keep it short we have a psychological advantage going into this match. I have something for each of you.
*MON walks by all the lads handing them each a suitcase. The lads pop them open to reveal....*
MON: Rifles, now if any Blackburn player enters the box, bring the mother down.
*Delph raises his hand*
Delph: I'm not sure the FA allows the use of rifles boss, if we use them on players in the box we're bound to give away penalties and perhaps be prosecuted by the laws of the land?
MON: Have you never heard commentators say 'if he'd done that on the street he'd have been arrested'?
Delph: Yes Mr. Martin but I don't think that...
MON: It's different rules on the pitch Fabian, you'll learn that.
*Dunne raise his hand*
Dunne: and tha' pennos bass?
MON: Brad Guzan.
*The dressing room nods and makes a sound of satisfaction and agreement*
Sidwell: Boss, why have I not got a rifle?
MON: You're dangerous enough Steve.
*The dressing room erupts with laughter*
Date:Monday January 4 2010
Villa Confirm 25 Man Premier League Squad (Thursday September 3 2015)
Sherwood On Gana - Richards On Gil (Thursday September 3 2015)
The Vital Villa Player Of August 2015 (Thursday September 3 2015)
Was The Aston Villa Transfer Window Good Enough? (Thursday September 3 2015)
Brad Guzan Remains USA No 1... For Now (Thursday September 3 2015)
Sherwood Ready To Take The Praise Or Blame (Thursday September 3 2015)
Vital Villa 2015/16 Fantasy League Standings (Wednesday September 2 2015)
Ilori Makes Move On Loan (Tuesday September 1 2015)
Bennett Gets Cherries Loan (Tuesday September 1 2015)
Lescott On Joining Boyhood Club (Tuesday September 1 2015)
|1.||Pride of Lions||164|
|Crystal Palace||2||-||1||Aston Villa|
|Aston Villa||0||-||1||Man Utd|
|AFC Bournemouth||0||-||1||Aston Villa|
|11. AFC Bournemouth||4||1||1||2||-1||4|
|12. Aston Villa||4||1||1||2||-1||4|
|Albion Confirm 25 Man Squad
» WBA : 03/09/2015 19:27:01
|Newcastle Announce Premier League Squad
» Newcastle : 03/09/2015 19:18:01
|City Announce 2015-16 Premier League Squad
» Man City : 03/09/2015 19:12:00
|Palace Announce 25 Man Squad
» Crystal Palace : 03/09/2015 19:05:00
|Villa Confirm 25 Man Premier League Squad
» Aston Villa : 03/09/2015 18:57:01