Vital Football

Latest Aston Villa News

Hercs In The Dressing Room (Pre-Man Utd)

Hercs In The Dressing Room (Pre-Man Utd)

*We join the lads nervous before their confrontation at Old Trafford, they're hustling to see who's on the team sheet*

Friedel: Yes! Yeeeeeeee Haaaaaaaaa!

*Friedel over enthusiastically celebrates, Sidwell rolls his eyes*

Sidwell: *sigh* Every week this is. ......Am I on it? I have a feeling I'll be in this week.

Petrov (sniggering): Yes Steve, you are on the list.

*Sidwell pumps his fist and works his way to the sheet running his finger down the list*

Sidwell: Hey! I'm not in the first team Stilyan ...... Wait.... I'm not even on the subs bench ...... 'Ballboy: Sidwell'!?

*MON Enters*

MON: Have you not read the team sheet Steven? What are you doing here?

Sidwell: but ....

MON: Off you toddle.

*Sidwell leaves the dressing room and joins the ballboys and girls getting their briefing*

Ballboy#1: alwright guvna!?

Ballboy#2: 'Ow's ya doin' me auld china?

Sidwell: Great (!) it's like 'Oliver!' in here!

*Back in the Dressing Room.....*

MON: Chins up lads, now I know we usually write off this tie as a loss, but this time things will be different!

Young: How so boss?

MON: Moustapha! Wheel them in!

*Salifou wheels in gas canister after gas canister*

Young: What's that?

MON: It's Oxygen!

*Gabby scratches his head*

Agbonlahor: How's getting rid of spots going to help us beat Man U boss?

MON: Not Oxy 10, Oxygen! I've been watching tapes and we're running out of steam after the 130th minute. With this Oxygen we'll have the boost to deal with whatever length of time Sir Alex imposes on the match.

Salifou: Boss, I'm tired of just delivering you the 'secret weapon' and being the butt of your jokes. I'm an international footballer, I deserve respect and I want to play.

*the dressing room erupts with laughter*

Salifou: What? I'm not joking.

*the dressing room erupts with laughter again*

Salifou: I demand respect!

*the dressing room falls about*

MON (lifting his glasses to wipe the tears from his eyes): Oh Moustapha, you're magnificent.

Salifou: So I start?

MON: No.

*the dressing room erupts with laughter once more, Brad Friedel is still pelvic thrusting with gusto in the background*

Friedel: In the team! Oh yeah baby! Number 1!



Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

Writer:Hercs
Date:Friday December 11 2009
Time: 10:38AM

Comments

0
lol, very amusing!
The Fear
11/12/2009 10:46:00
0
lol, very amusing!
The Fear
11/12/2009 10:46:00
0
lol, that picture of Salifou is perfect, he looks a player who demands respect.
Hercs
11/12/2009 10:59:00
0
lol, that picture of Salifou is perfect, he looks a player who demands respect.
Hercs
11/12/2009 10:59:00
0
ahh, i feel sorry for Salifou - then again he still earns more than i ever will so scratch that! Cheers Hercs, class again.
davidsands1982
11/12/2009 11:37:00
0
ahh, i feel sorry for Salifou - then again he still earns more than i ever will so scratch that! Cheers Hercs, class again.
davidsands1982
11/12/2009 11:37:00
0
agreed Hercs, not sure I'd argue with the guy!
The Fear
11/12/2009 12:46:00
0
agreed Hercs, not sure I'd argue with the guy!
The Fear
11/12/2009 12:46:00
0
He looks like he's saying "Hey! O'Neill where's my respect you foo'!?" I've never heard him talk so I'm assuming he sounds and talks like Mr.T
Hercs
11/12/2009 15:14:00
0
He looks like he's saying "Hey! O'Neill where's my respect you foo'!?" I've never heard him talk so I'm assuming he sounds and talks like Mr.T
Hercs
11/12/2009 15:14:00
Page 1/2
  1. 1
  2. 2

Login to post a comment

Recent Aston Villa Articles

Stats: Aston Villa v Middlesbrough

All the stats from Aston Villa (0) vs (2) Middlesbrough, Villa Park, 19/9/17 Att: 11,197

Aston Villa v Middlesbrough - Team Sheets - 19-9-17

Aston Villa are at Villa Park with Middlesbrough the visitors for the latest League Cup game.

Bruce Looking For Middlesbrough Win

Aston Villa manager Steve Bruce's press conference ahead of the Middlesbrough clash took place earlier today and he again confirmed it would be a mixed starting...

Aston Villa v Middlesbrough - Follow On Twitter - 19-9-17

Aston Villa are at Villa Park with Middlesbrough the visitors today, this will be a 7:45pm kick-off.

Archived Vital Villa Articles

Vital Villa articles from

Site Journalists

J P Fear
Editor email
Profile
Mike Field
Editor email
Profile
Steve Wade
no email
Profile
JuanPablo Angel
no email
Profile
Glensider
no email
Profile

Current Poll (see more polls)

LC - Middlesbrough MotM
Suggested By: Site Staff
Steer1%
Hutton0%
Elphick0%
Samba0%
De Laet0%
Lansbury0%
Doyle-Hayes44%
Onomah11%
O'Hare0%
Bjarnason11%
Hogan0%
Sub - McCormack22%
Sub - Lyden0%
Sub - Blackett-Taylor11%
ScoopDragon Publishing Entire League Network of Sites
Vital Football Comment
Latest F1 News
Blog: Singapore GP Report
Latest Vital Boxing News
Saunders Looking for Khan Fight
Write for Vital Football

Recent Aston Villa Results (view all)

Aston Villa Fixtures (view all)

Vital Members League Table

RankNamePoints
1.JuanPabloAngel228
2.The Fear224
3.sirdennis191
4.Pride of Lions162
5.Fulford155
6.Melon Donkey138
7.HeathfieldRoad1874134
8.Silhillvilla123
9.BodyButter110
10.mike_field91
The Vital Football Members League