Vital Football

Latest Aston Villa News

In The Dressing Room (Before The Bolton Game)

In The Dressing Room (Before The Bolton Game)

*We join the Villa boys preparing for Bolton*

MON: Now where's Isaiah with my Earl Grey?

Salifou (through tears): You sent him to Middlesbrough on loan boss.

MON: Ah yes, here's hoping he gets enough experience on their bench to improve his posture, it was getting terrible. OK lads, tough time out last match, we have to be wary Bolton have been playing some clever, entertaining football as of late.

*The Dressing Room erupts with laughter*

MON: Joking aside, Bolton are a physical team. So I've gathered some pictures to incite a rage to match theirs.

*MON walks towards a notice board with three covered pictures, he uncovers the first, it's a picture of Peter Kay, many of the lads laugh*

MON: Don't laugh! I want rage!

Young: We can't help it boss, everyone loves Peter Kay, he's a national icon.

*Sidwell is seething*

Sidwell: I don't love him boss, I hate him ... Grr!

MON: That's more like it Steven, everyone take Steven's example.

Young: But he's always angry at everyone.

*Sidwell turns to Young and sneers whilst growling*

MON: That's what we need, fire, passion ... And next ....

*MON uncovers the next picture, it's a Yorkshire Pudding. The lads look confused, some look hungry, Delph raises his hand*

MON: Fabian?

Delph: Boss, I'm pretty sure that Bolton's in Lancashire.

MON: Same thing Fabian, same thing.

Young: Again boss, everyone loves a yorkie pud, I could eat one now. with grav....

Sidwell: I hate Yorkshire pudding, if there was one here I'd kick it.

Young: Not even with a Sunday Dinn....?

Sidwell: I'd kick it! I'd break it's legs.

Young: Steve, Yorkshire puddings don't have legs.

Sidwell: Not after I'd finished with them they wouldn't!

MON: Right then, you're not all as enraged as I thought you'd be so here is the final picture.

*MON reveals the picture, it's Vernon Kay with a large grin and shiny suit. The lads go ballistic snarling and yelling, NRC leaps from his chair, tears the picture down with his teeth and shakes it like a rabid dog*

MON: Now that's more like it.

*The lads are fighting over who gets to stamp on the picture, Sidwell appears to be in complete bliss at this scene*

MON: Now we're ready for Bolton, now who wants a red card ... I mean to play right back?

*All the lads raise their hands including Friedel and Guzan*

MON: Yes, now we're ready.

Hercs

------------

MON: right then, *lowers glasses* Cueller back at the back *ticks box* hmmm....Warnock's a bit sore, mite rest him......who to plaaaaaaaaayyy *scratches chin*

Shorey coughs

mon: ahhh Nicky

ns: yes boss?!?!?

mon: 2 sugars please *winks*

ns: o.....ok

mon: bouuuuuuumaaaaaaaaaa!

wb: yes!!!!!?????

mon: what times the dancing on tomorrow night?

wb: erm, don't know.....

mon: o thanks *mutters* cant get the staff these days

wb: huh?

mon: nothing......right, who we got then............*spins chair and stares at Luke Young*

*squad all look at young*

mon: Lukey ma'boy.........

young: ah for f*** sake!!!!!!!!!!!!

Benham




Bookmark and Share



Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

Writer:Hercs & Benham
Date:Saturday November 7 2009
Time: 10:57AM

Login to post a comment

Best of Vital Network

Vital Boxing - Tyson Fury Retires?

Recent Aston Villa Articles

Watford Boost Following Germany Disappointment

Aston Villa are offering fans who travelled to Germany for the game with Arminia Bielefeld a free ticket for this weekend's tie against Watford in the inaugural Graham Taylor...

Cissokho Exit Almost Confirmed

Yeni Malatayaspor's sporting director Ali Ravci has confirmed that Aly Cissokho is now extremely close to exiting Aston Villa and arriving at the Turkish club.

Veretout Completes Fiorentina Move

Jordan Veretout yesterday completed his move to Italian Serie A side Fiorentina bringing an end to speculation about his future.

Tamworth To Feature A Stronger Squad?

With the cancellation of Tuesday evening's friendly against Arminia Bielefeld owing to adverse weather, Steve Bruce may now send a few seniors to Friday evening's Tamworth friendly.

Archived Vital Villa Articles

Vital Villa articles from

Site Journalists

J P Fear
Editor email
Profile
Mike Field
Editor email
Profile
Steve Wade
no email
Profile
JuanPablo Angel
no email
Profile
Glensider
no email
Profile

Current Poll (see more polls)

Ross McCormack?
Suggested By: JP Fear
I'd rather him sold60%
I'd rather he got back to his best for us39%
Unsure1%
ScoopDragon Publishing Entire League Network of Sites
Vital Football Comment
Latest F1 News
Blog: Hungaroring Preview
Latest Vital Boxing News
Tyson Fury Retires?
Write for Vital Football

Recent Aston Villa Results (view all)

Aston Villa Fixtures (view all)

Vital Members League Table

RankNamePoints
1.The Fear415
2.col8348
3.Pride of Lions265
4.sirdennis257
5.JuanPabloAngel255
6.mike_field206
7.DeanoVilla196
8.1958Villan152
9.HeathfieldRoad1874152
10.Fulford149
The Vital Football Members League