Date:Monday October 12 2009
Herc with another fly on the wall account of life in the Villa dressing room!
*MON storms into his office where Stilyan Petrov and Emile Heskey are eating bowls of Sugar Puffs*
MON: What the hell is this!?
*MON slams a paper on the table in front of Heskey*
MON: You're going to leave me? And I find out through the papers?!
Heskey: Boss I...
MON: Who do you think you are? Jude Law?
Heskey: Look boss they've taken it out of context....
MON: What next? Have you got a child with someone else!?
Heskey: Boss! It's not like we're in a relationship.
MON: What's wrong with you players? Of course it's a relationship, this contract *MON waves Heskey's contract* is like a marriage between man and club.
Heskey: I think you're being a bit ....
MON: A bit what Emile? A bit what?! Players today, in my day we would proudly wear the club's kit like a wedding dress, parade about in it we would, got married in my full Nottingham Forest kit I did. Everyday was the best day of your life. Nowadays it's all illegimate love-ins with the press.
Heskey: Now come on!
MON: You come on! I take you in, let you eat my Sugar Puffs. As a matter of fact give me those Sugar Puffs.
*MON snatches the bowl from Emile*
MON: They're my Sugar Puffs, Emile. Mine!
Heskey: Now you're just being childish boss.
MON: Childish!? Would a child do this?
*MON raises his hands to either side of his head like ears and brays like a donkey*
MON: Eyore! Eyore!
Heskey: What? What is this? Are you calling me a donkey?
MON: Yes Emile a donkey! YOU are a donkey! Now what am I?
*MON lies still on the ground, Petrov chimes in*
Petrov: Ooh, boss I don't know, what are you?
MON: I'm Emile 'holding up the ball'
*Petrov bursts out laughing*
Petrov: It is funny because Emile is always falling over when he is getting the ball.
Heskey: You monster!
*Heskey flees from the office using his forearm to hide his tearful eyes*
Date:Monday October 12 2009
Delph Out Until The New Year (Saturday October 25 2014)
Lambert Looking For QPR Response (Friday October 24 2014)
QPR Injury Update (Friday October 24 2014)
The Villa Times - 24/10/2014 (Friday October 24 2014)
Lawro In Villa Win Shocker - Mystic In Depression (Friday October 24 2014)
Which Kick Off Time Is Hated The Most? (Friday October 24 2014)
Lambert - Time To Change Our Focus (Thursday October 23 2014)
Vlaar Wants A Return To Winning Ways (Thursday October 23 2014)
Drennan Returns - So Time For A Round Up (Wednesday October 22 2014)
Okore Not Ready For Premiership Action (Tuesday October 21 2014)
|1.||Pride of Lions||742|
|8.||Villan Of The North||159|
|Aston Villa||0||-||2||Man City|
|Aston Villa||2||-||1||Hull City|
|13. Aston Villa||8||3||1||4||-8||10|
|15. Leicester City||8||2||3||3||-2||9|
|16. Crystal Palace||9||2||3||4||-3||9|
» Sunderland : 25/10/2014 17:31:00
» Crystal Palace : 25/10/2014 17:06:00
» WBA : 25/10/2014 17:01:00
» Southampton : 25/10/2014 16:55:00
» Hull City : 25/10/2014 16:51:00