Vital Football

Latest Aston Villa News

An Expired Pizza to Enter Jordan

An Expired Pizza to Enter Jordan

There is nothing more annoying than a parent who talks endlessly about how 'clever` or 'sporty` their child is, before whipping out a picture of some spotty two foot hooligan tucking in to the contents of his nostril.

My Goliath though, is genuinely bright for his age. The wee lad can speak about 10 words now; that`s three more than Paul Merson.

The little fellow will definitely be a footballer when he grows up. The last time we had a kick around in the garden he nutmegged me twice; nobody`s regretted opening their legs on two separate occasions since Mrs Neville. You won`t regret a bet on Manchester United at 3/10 to waltz past Watford in a one-sided FA Cup semi.

If the media are to be believed, and you`ll never find a more honest bunch of lads, Jose Mourinho is considering managing England when his tenure expires at Stamford Bridge.

This would be the greatest result for the average Englishman since Gareth Gates wore down Jordan with a pizza and some of the longest chat-up lines in history.

Chelsea have already beaten Blackburn on three occasions this season, a fourth win at 4/7 will set up the most eagerly awaited showdown since Peter Andre narrowly defeated Gareth Gates in a bare-knuckled 15 round extravaganza.

A few people are beginning to question Arsene Wenger, but Aristotle was once mocked when he suggested the Earth was round. Rumours of Arsenal`s demise have been leaked prematurely, they can return to winning ways against Bolton at a huge 8/11.

Liverpool are finishing the season with aplomb; Bellamy I think his name is. The Pool have won their last three against Manchester City by a single goal; another Liverpool victory is advised at 10/11.

Charlton`s recovery in recent weeks has been nothing short of sensational. The Addicks are on a real high, they can snatch an invaluable point from Goodison Park at 5/2.

Aston Villa return to the Riverside for the first time since a 4-0 cakewalk led to a visionary Middlesbrough fan hurling his season ticket at Steve McClaren. A punt on the Villa at 12/5 will lead to a healthy prophet.

It`s the Blades versus the Hammers at Bramall Lane; that`s more tools than you`d find in a Peter Andre fan club. It`s a must-win game for both teams; I`m siding with the rejuvenated West Ham at 2/1.

When I suggested that Wigan were a good bet for relegation in my pre-season write-up, I received more stick than a Manchester United fan in Rome. Another Tottenham win at 7/5 will place the cat well and truly amongst the pigeons.

I`m not too sure about Fulham`s decision to sack Chris Coleman a mere three days before a massive match away to Reading. I guess Mohammed Al Fayed wants to guarantee at least one decent result against the Royals. The arrival of Lawrie 'Dirty` Sanchez can inspire the Cottagers to a hard-fought point at 12/5.

David James is the Pauline Fowler of the football world; you wouldn`t want to get involved in a conversation with him, but he`s the man to see if you need a clean sheet. The fashion icon needs one more shutout to break the all-time Premiership record; a home fixture against Newcastle can land a Portsmouth win at 11/10 and a new record for Calamity at 6/4.

Arsenal, Portsmouth, Man Utd, Tottenham and Chelsea form a 16/1 weekend accer that is so candid, Peter Andre has decided to share his life story via the medium of a new single. 'What was I thinking` is released in all good record shops on Monday morning.

Weekend Betting:

Arsenal v Bolton

Saturday 14th April 15:00

Arsenal 8/11
Draw 13/5
Bolton 9/2

Get on: Arsenal

Match Special:
Arsenal to score three or more goals 9/4

Man City v Liverpool
Saturday 14th April 15:00

Man City 7/2
Draw 5/2
Liverpool 10/11

Get on: Liverpool

Match Special:
Gerrard to score at any time 11/4

Middlesbrough v Aston Villa
Saturday 14th April 15:00

Middlesbrough 11/10
Draw 23/10
Aston Villa 12/5

Get on: Aston Villa

Match Special:
Agbonlahor to score two or more goals 9/1

Portsmouth v Newcastle
Saturday 14th April 15:00

Portsmouth 11/10
Draw 23/10
Newcastle 13/5

Get on: Portsmouth

Match Special:
Portsmouth to win and keep a clean sheet 12/5

Reading v Fulham
Saturday 14th April 15:00

Reading 10/11
Draw 12/5
Fulham 10/3

Get on: Draw

Match Special:
Lita to score in a 1-1 draw 12/1

Sheff Utd v West Ham
Saturday 14th April 15:00

Sheff Utd 6/4
Draw 23/10
West Ham 2/1

Get on: West Ham

Match Special:
Tevez to score the only goal of the game 40/1

Watford v Man Utd
FA Cup semi final
Saturday 14th April 17:30
Live on BBC One

Watford 12/1
Draw 9/2
Man Utd 3/10

Get on: Man Utd

Match Special:
Rooney and Ronaldo both to score 9/2

Wigan v Tottenham
Sunday 15th April 13:30
Live on Sky

Wigan 2/1
Draw 23/10
Tottenham 7/5

Get on: Tottenham

Match Special:
Tottenham to keep a clean sheet 13/8

Everton v Charlton
Sunday 15th April 15:00

Everton 3/4
Draw 5/2
Charlton 4/1

Get on: Draw

Match Special:
No goalscorer in the match 10/1

Blackburn v Chelsea
FA Cup semi final
Sunday 15th April 16:00
Live on Sky

Blackburn 6/1
Draw 14/5
Chelsea 4/7

Get on: Chelsea

Match Special:
Ballack to score with a header 6/1

By Gerry McDonnell

Win FREE pizza with Vital Football!
Select your team and get 50% off if they score twice.
www.papajohns.co.uk/football


Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

Writer:Site Staff
Date:Thursday April 12 2007
Time: 10:04AM

Best of Vital Network

Comments

0
Another top quality article from Gerry McDonnell. The guy has talent, real talent. He gets better by the week. Great read.
glensider
14/04/2007 01:29:00
Page 1/1
  1. 1

Login to post a comment

Recent Aston Villa Articles

What Did Villa Earn In 2015/16

With the 2015-16 season behind us, the final television allocation money based on league positions have been confirmed.

Okore On His Way - And Amavi?

Jores Okore is safely edging his bets about his future at Aston Villa following relegation, and French left back Jordan Amavi is being linked with a loan away...

Laursen Reflects On His Time At Villa

Martin Laursen has reflected on the time he spent at Villa Park, and been speaking of his memories of late.

SO! What Does Aston Villa Need From The Takeover??

So... what does Aston Villa need with regards to the takeover?

Archived Vital Villa Articles

Vital Villa articles from

Site Journalists

J P Fear
Editor email
Profile
Mike Field
Editor email
Profile
Steve Wade
no email
Profile
Villa_Grizzly
no email
Profile
Turkish Penguin
no email
Profile
Glensider
no email
Profile
Chris Heath
no email
Profile
M Calucar
no email
Profile
JuanPablo Angel
no email
Profile

Current Poll (see more polls)

Roberto Di Matteo would be:
Suggested By: JP Fear
A great appointment27%
A good appointment but I'd prefer a.n.other39%
An average appointment21%
No thanks appointment!13%
ScoopDragon Premier League Network Sites

League Table

# Team P W D L Pts. GD
C Leicester City 38 23 12 3 81 32
2 Arsenal 38 20 11 7 71 29
3 Spurs 38 19 13 6 70 34
4 Man City 38 19 9 10 66 30
5 Man Utd 38 19 9 10 66 14
6 Southampton 38 18 9 11 63 18
7 West Ham 38 16 14 8 62 14
8 Liverpool 38 16 12 10 60 13
9 Stoke 38 14 9 15 51 -14
10 Chelsea 38 12 14 12 50 6
11 Everton 38 11 14 13 47 4
12 Swansea 38 12 11 15 47 -10
13 Watford 38 12 9 17 45 -10
14 WBA 38 10 13 15 43 -14
15 Crystal Palace 38 11 9 18 42 -12
16 AFC Bournemouth 38 11 9 18 42 -22
17 Sunderland 38 9 12 17 39 -14
R Newcastle 38 9 10 19 37 -21
R Norwich 38 9 7 22 34 -28
R Aston Villa 38 3 8 27 17 -49
The Vital Football Members League
Latest F1 News
2016 Monaco GP - FP2
Latest Vital Boxing News
Eubank Jnr in Goodwill Gesture
Vital Football Comment

Recent Aston Villa Results (view all)

Aston Villa Fixtures (view all)

Vital Members League Table

RankNamePoints
1.Pride of Lions820
2.The Fear478
3.kefkat340
4.sirdennis290
5.Lerner Out!250
6.Fulford239
7.JuanPabloAngel226
8.glensider205
9.DeanoVilla172
10.Silhillvilla161
Write for Vital Football