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'If It's Football, It's Vital'

Rampant Lions Go Bonking Mad

Reasons to be cheerful, part one, two, three.

So, what do you do if you're at a Premiership game and you start to get bored? Lets face it, the entrance fee isn't cheap these days and you don't always get full entertainment. Last season I used to take my knitting, the football was rubbish but I got some lovely hats!

Maybe this couple had a better idea as two Villa fans were caught bonking in the disabled toilets at Wigan! Us men really do know how to show the ladies a good time don't we, not only did this lucky lady get to go to a match with her chap, he also serviced her in the toilets. And they said romance was dead!

A Wobbly Wigan dude said: “Two Aston Villa fans, a male and a female, were discovered after having spent over half an hour in the disabled toilets in the away end of the stadium.'

Thanks for making it clear it was a male and a female, I'd images of a goat myself. And half an hour? Don't tell me he had to enter into foreplay as well, wonder what it was, probably reading exerts from the match programme I guess. Again with the spoiling of women, we really are just too good.

“Noises had been heard coming from the inside the toilet.'

Cough, cough, moving swiftly on.

“Stewards knocked on the door and asked the couple to come out which they did. They were asked to leave and did so without any fuss. They were quite embarrassed.”

Or maybe they were just flushed?

One onlooker said: “It was quite obvious they weren’t disabled.”

Jeez, they've even got an onlooker! No indignation at the fact they'd been at it hammer and tongues, just that they weren't disabled.

Ahh, the beautiful game.






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The Journalist

Writer: J P Fear Mail feedback, articles or suggestions

Date:Thursday November 23 2006

Time: 6:09PM

Your Comments

I think its lovely that you and Mrs Fear are making sure that your love never dies by adding different things to your relationship, variety is the spice of life, good on ya chap, keep it up. UTV
steff_the_villan
My Mrs wants to go to the matches without me. Should I be worried?
Gazvilla
It's the one on the end in the picture!
Gazvilla
when you gotta go, you gotta go!!
bobbyfett
Oh ****, sorry Gazvilla, she didn't mention she was with anyone.
steff_the_villan
I might start sending my missus to the away games. Hopefully she won't come back.
voiceoftheholte
Here's my wish list, am i bonking mad: 1. Defoe. 2. SWP or Routledge. 3. Milner.4. Geremi (i've been saying this for weeks by the way). 5. Kevin Nolan. 6. Barton from MANC.
koolbill
koolbill ..... you are bonking mad! SWP or Milner I agree with as this is the only position where we have no competition for Gabi.. We are OK for midfielders so Barton, Geremi or Nolan would be pointless. Up front we need quality. Defoe is no better or worse than what we have got. If he is not good enougth to play for Spuds every week, why would he be good enough for a club significantly further up the table. You might want to look at his scoring record before answering this???
voiceoftheholte
Maybe I should start going to Villa matches?? The halftime entertainment sounds much better than at Dean Court
cherry_brandy
cherry_brandy, you stay where you are ........ just send your missus.
voiceoftheholte
Mr Fear , have they erected a statue of there head of shareholders in Wigans toilets?
silkie villain
 

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