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Doug Thanked By Man City

Manchester City lost 6 in a row before visiting Villa Park. They are apparently sending a bouquet of flowers to Doug Ellis today in thanks for making our squad so paper thin that we are always willing to oblige teams on a bad run. David O'Leary received the same gratitude from Wigan who hadn't won all year at home. Tweedle dee and tweedle dum were unavailable for comment but were thought to be counting the riches they are making off the back of us 'mugs' (aka supporters).

Darius Vassell didn't say: 'I can't believe how my former club treat me so well, I can't usually score in a brothel and yet I've been allowed four against Villa. They really are my mates'.

Jonathan Fear was more enraged by the lack of water at Villa Park saying to the press - as they ran in the opposite direction 'Ellis isn't all bad and David O'Leary is quite obviously a managerial genius, my main gripe - and I might do a banner to protest - is that with just 26 500 people attending the game the club still couldn't order in enough bottles of water'.

He continued - on his own by now as the press had all left:

'The game was so exciting and I was doing so much cheering that it became obvious to me that I would need a second bottle of water (without the cap obviously on health and safety grounds) for the second half. However the lady behind the kiosk said they had sold out. Well you can imagine my shock. In fact the whole evening was ruined by the lack of a second half drink, I might not go back again'.




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The Journalist

Writer: J P Fear Mail feedback, articles or suggestions

Date:Wednesday April 26 2006

Time: 12:23PM

Your Comments

chocolate muffins yesterday, bottles of water today, this site is nothing if not total quality.
The Fear
chocolate muffins yesterday, bottles of water today, this site is nothing if not total quality.
The Fear
I reckon I could do a better job though ;)
wmurphy
I reckon I could do a better job though ;)
wmurphy
get back to the forum and do as you are told.
The Fear
get back to the forum and do as you are told.
The Fear
I will be at the Sunderland game, I wonder will that game be another record, the lowest attendance for a final home game Joe Harvey Dublin
irish villa
I will be at the Sunderland game, I wonder will that game be another record, the lowest attendance for a final home game Joe Harvey Dublin
irish villa
oh dear oh dear Ellis isn't all bad, O'leary..genius, bottles of water and muffins, I have to say I do fear for you all! The white coats are coming.
sdandrk
oh dear oh dear Ellis isn't all bad, O'leary..genius, bottles of water and muffins, I have to say I do fear for you all! The white coats are coming.
sdandrk
White coats arrived a long long time ago for me I'm afraid. They only let me do this as part of my care in the community therapy. Irish Villa, the attendance will be better because the Sunderland fans will no doubt come on masse in fancy dress again.
The Fear
White coats arrived a long long time ago for me I'm afraid. They only let me do this as part of my care in the community therapy. Irish Villa, the attendance will be better because the Sunderland fans will no doubt come on masse in fancy dress again.
The Fear
I'll be putting in a rare appearance at the Sunderland game too! After getting caned by the Scousers (Crouch to end his scoring drought no doubt). We'll aim to scrape a nil nil!
tarzan
I'll be putting in a rare appearance at the Sunderland game too! After getting caned by the Scousers (Crouch to end his scoring drought no doubt). We'll aim to scrape a nil nil!
tarzan
keep taking the pills and I will see you next year, enjoy the sunderland game, then you can look forward to the world cup, even you Irish villa
sdandrk
keep taking the pills and I will see you next year, enjoy the sunderland game, then you can look forward to the world cup, even you Irish villa
sdandrk
We might reach 33,000 if we go into the Sunderland game still not mathmatically sure of staying up (i.e. on the back of a hammering at Anfield accompanied by winning results tomorrow for Pompey and SHA).
glensider
We might reach 33,000 if we go into the Sunderland game still not mathmatically sure of staying up (i.e. on the back of a hammering at Anfield accompanied by winning results tomorrow for Pompey and SHA).
glensider
 

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